TriangleArrow-Left.svgSeptember 2013 Issues of the Questaholic Magazine November 2013TriangleArrow-Right.svg

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Interview with Clan Quest's Own World
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Earth is a well-known Low Councilor even to those who are new to Clan Quest. He may sometimes get out of orbit once in awhile due to the need of some space for real life, he could somehow manage to beam back in and be in the loop again. Do you ever wonder why he calls himself Earth? Well, let’s find out.

Pre interview via Facebook

29/08/2013 12:02
Liz Beth

Hey Earth, how are you? Has school started for you? You're in college now, aren't you? I would like to interview you for Questaholic Magazine, are you up for it? I know you're very busy with school and all. Just let me know. I'm doing one more interview before I do my disappearing act! I'll be very busy in RL in the next 3 months or so. Hope all's well with you.

29/08/2013 13:46

Interview me?
Well sure, I guess.

29/08/2013 15:24
Liz Beth

Awesome! Don't worry, it's going to be painful...I mean...painless.

29/08/2013 15:24

20- icon neutral.gif
so anyway

29/08/2013 15:29
Liz Beth

Yes, you're not reading our Questaholic magazine are you? Yeah, clan mates will post questions for you and you just answer them. I'll pm them to you via offsite, or would fb pm be better?

29/08/2013 15:29

20- icon neutral.gif
offsite I guess.

29/08/2013 15:42
Liz Beth

Great! I'll pm the questions via offsite then. I think it's easier if I send them as they come in rather than in one shot, so you won't get too overwhelmed in case you receive a lot of questions. Some might be personal, too, but you can always opt to answer them or not.
Tsk! You're not reading our magazine. I'm going to tell Msk!

29/08/2013 15:43

I don't have tiiiiiiiiiimmmmmmeeee
and I don't really mind answering a lot of questions at once if it's on text
I can take my time on each.
2- icon smile.gif

29/08/2013 15:48
Liz Beth

I know you're a busy noob.
Okeedokee then, I'll post a thread for your questions tomorrow.
Cheers! Good luck with school! Love your main source of nourishment, by the way (From Earth's Facebook post).

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29/08/2013 15:49

and lol!
I'm not going to have to grocery shopping for another month, and I eat whatever I need at the cafe here anyway, so why not?

The Interview


Hey, "Urf"
I've heard you referred to as a Planet. Definition of a Plant = Body of Earth surrounded by Sky. Is your Sky always blue even if you get out of orbit?

- I'm always orbiting something. 15- icon wink.gif
Due to the dispersion of light in the atmosphere and other sciencey things, my sky is actually purple, but since the eyes of you mere mortals are more sensitive to blue, it appears blue to you.

Kidding aside, what do you most want to tell us about yourself?

- Well, I am a staff member of the RuneScape fansite RSBandB. Whenever a quest comes out, I guest on their podcast "RSBandbUpdate!" as the resident lore expert. YOU SHOULD REALLY CHECK IT OUT!

- We want to do a lore focus episode where we talk about the lore of RuneScape, but right now the only way we could do that is if I ramble on for an hour or two, which isn't interesting. COME THERE AND HELP US FIGURE IT OUT! (Shameless advertising).

What are your favorite colors? Foods? Music? Sayings? Hobbies? Pets?

- In order: Blue; pizza, burgers, and grilled cheese; classic rock; my motto is "Because I can", typically in reference to computers; tinkering with computers; Beagle puppies. 24- herz.png

What do you enjoy most about the RS game?

- In addition to quests, I enjoy the *real* community. Not all these people who whine all the time about everything, but people like those in Clan Quest. They actually care about the game.

About the Offsite?

- The great things we do on here like the Questaholic magazine and organizing events. I also like that everything is written down here so when I get confused about something I can just come and look.

I think I heard that you did not read the Questaholic much...are you going to read it now?

- Since I'm in college now, I have all the free time in the world! Of course, I will!

Wise Ork:

The ending song of Wall-E is called "down to earth"; how does that song's title make you feel?

- Indifferent.

The earth has a face, can you show us yours? 2- icon smile.gif

- Included at the bottom of the article. 2- icon smile.gif

I have attached a picture of you battling a gun; how was this battle concluded? How did it even begin? Why are you a female earth in this picture?

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- That's actually Ytse. The battle ended when I thwacked Ytse away. I'm not sure how it began, but I'm sure Ytse did something to upset this inanimate object. As for the female part...I think Ytse was a little out of his mind there...

What's the most random/silly thing you can think of?

- Sillycat.

What's your opinion on the cuteness of Bengal Tiger cubs?

- Beagles are better. 24- herz.png

If you had a button which, when pressed, would give you $500.000 but kill 1 random person in your country every time it's pressed; would you press this button? Why/Why not?

- No. I wouldn't do that.

Santa ends:

What do you do when you're unhappy?

- Depending on the situation, be grumpy, cry, punch walls, vent to someone, yell at people, or any combination of those.

What do you do to fix the problem?

- Sleep, eat food (brownies are the best), and find a way to resolve the problem if I can.


What's with the "thwack"?

- I really have no idea where that came from. XD
It just stuck. *thwacks*

Why do you despise Hamachi?



What’s your favorite pun?

- Calling Hamachi a good piece of software.


Why haven't you made me any more pants?

- Ytse keeps taking the items I need to make some. 3- icon sad.gif


Hey Earth! Curious, why the RS name “Earth271072”? Also, what are those numbers at the end?

- Well, I LOVE space, and when I was younger I played games on Nickelodeon's website, and since I couldn't get Earth, it suggested Earth27. Later on... Neopets I think? Earth27 was taken, and it suggested Earth27107. Then, when I got to RuneScape, I apparently made "earth27107" and forgot about it. So I just thought "Okay, I'll add a 2 on the end!" And thus, Earth271072.

How long have you been playing RuneScape? How did you get started?

- I have been playing RuneScape for... Oh wow, almost 10 years now. 5- icon eek.gif
A friend showed it to me and I liked it!

When did you join Clan Quest and how did you find out about it?

I joined Clan Quest in... according to the forums, August 2010. 5- icon eek.gif
Tempus fugit...CQ was featured on the front page of the RuneScape website and I came to check it out and loved it!

What do you like most about this clan? What do you like the least?

- What do I like most?
That there are other weird people like me who actually read the dialogue in quests and also made me realize that following a guide for quests takes a lot of the fun out of it!
And also occurrences like these:

- What do I like least?
Eh...Probably Leo or Loud.
They're both lame.

Priceless comments! I think you’re the one who started out having quoted comments in signatures?

- I think so, but I could be wrong.

What topic would you like to talk about so I could base my questions on that? I know you're a freshman in college, do you already have a set major to pursue or are you still indecisive? Are you a full time student? Tell me something about yourself and what you would like your clan mates to know about you. That's the hardest question for the interviewee sometimes. 1- icon biggrin.png

- I do have a major set and all of that. 1- icon biggrin.png I want to be a computer engineer with at least a minor in computer science. I am a full time student.

"Tell me something about yourself and what you would like your clan mates to know about you."


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LMAO! 61- lol.gif

- You might want to change "FUCK" to "SHIT", but that's up to you.

Nah, I’ll leave it. It’s innocuous compared to the nuclear F-bomb.

- Fair enough.

Computer Engineering is an awesome combination of Electrical Engineering and Computer Science, what made you decide to major and minor on those? Were you influenced by a loved one or a fascination to be able to improve the present technology in the future?

- I'm really good with computers. I'm a bit surprised I haven't become tech support for my floor yet.

You could also start your own computer business thing...someday?

- Perhaps one day...

College life is totally different from high school, how do you like it so far?

- Well, I went to a private school, so thus far I seem to be very well prepared for the workload. I HAVE SO MUCH FREE TIME!
I guess that's what happens going from getting up at 6 AM, getting to school around 8 AM, being in classes until 3 PM, having tech crew until 5:30 PM, then working until around 6:30-7:00 PM then getting home at around 8:00 PM THEN starting homework to having 2-4 hours of classes per day and maybe an hour to two hours of homework total.
So yeah, I love it. I'm finally able to play RS again.
1- icon biggrin.png

Wow! What a big difference in work load! Does that mean you spend a bit more time playing RuneScape now?

- Yes! 1- icon biggrin.png

- The only complain I have are the people in my dorm who listen to terrible music. To give an example, I was woken up from a very nice nap by a song consisting entirely of "nigga don't worry 'bout nothin' " repeated over and over again. That was incredibly uninspiring. Thankfully, my speakers are better. 13- icon twisted.gif

Oh my, waking you up with that kind of music would make you crabby for the rest of the day. Do you share a room with someone? Do they allow loud music in your dorm? So is there like a battle of music going on every time? Perhaps, try those headphones with noise-cancelling feature.

- Oh yeah, somehow I managed to get a private room. 2- icon smile.gif
Battle would imply that they have a chance. I don't need noise cancelling headphones; being the audiophile that I am, my speakers are a lot better than theirs. They recently bought some new ones that might have had a chance had their pirated music not been of very low quality (that cuts off the low and high ends of the audible spectrum, and since really high pitched things aren't in music generally, the only thing affected is the bass. That's why lower quality audio sounds like the higher pitched sounds are emphasized).
Here's a more technical explanation if anyone is interested...
If they ever do manage to beat me, I have some 300 Watt speakers lined up that I can get if I need to (my current ones are 80 Watts).
I'm a troll, so I counter their music with things like the finale to the 1812 Overture (Cannons!), Stars and Stripes Forever, and naturally,
this. 6- icon cool.gif

Oh nice! Thank you for the information regarding audio sounds. My son would be interested in that. Also, i liked those music of yours to troll!

- I didn't know you had a son. 4- icon surprised.gif

You do now. 1- icon biggrin.png

What do you think of RuneScape3? Do you still prefer the older RuneScape?

- I love it! The new interface system was a little weird at first, but once I got everything the way I liked it was great 2- icon smile.gif The beta's good too!

It took me awhile to get used to the combat system, how about you?

- Not really. I've played other MMOs, so I'm used to the whole abilities thing.

You have 99 farming. Obviously, that's your favorite skill, but do you also like farming in real life? Do you still do farming every time you're in game?

- I actually got 99 Farming because I talk too much and say stupid things sometimes.  :lol: I promised that I'd get 99 Farming for god knows why. I probably should do more farming than I do lol.

What's your next 99 to achieve? Is it Mage?

- Yeesh, I'm not sure. Herblore, maybe? I'm getting a dragon keepsake box for my untrimmed farming cape no matter what happens, though.

What's your favorite novel and who's your favorite author?

- Nooooo... I can't pick that...
The Percy Jackson books are really good, as are
The Secrets of the Immortal Nichols Flamel series.

As for real life, what do you see yourself doing 10 years from now? It's the same question as Santa Ends', "What's your goal in life?"

- If all goes as planned, I want to take over as the directory of technology at my old high school when the current one becomes a history teacher in 5 years. 1- icon biggrin.png

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Thank you, Earth, for doing this interview. No wonder you are so well-liked, not only are you witty, you are also nice, smart, and very thoughtful! Wishing you all the best in RuneScape and your Engineering career.
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Article by LizBeth

Halloween Algebra
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For Halloween, Mr. Olowitz bought 8 bags of candy bars and 4 bags of lollipops for a total cost of $51.56. Later that day he realized he didn’t have enough candy and went back to the same store and bought 3 more bags of candy bars and 3 more bags of lollipops at the same prices for a total cost of $23.82. While in the store on his second trip, Mr. Olowitz ran into his neighbor, Mrs. Pinion. If Mrs. Pinion bought 3 bags of candy bars and 11 bags of lollipops at the same prices, what was her total cost?

Do not cheat or you'll be thrown into the fiery furnace. 13- icon twisted.gif


I hope that was easy and fun for you. Cheers! 24- herz.png

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Article by LizBeth

~!~ Recipes ~!~
~ by Lizbeth ~
Bacon Wrapped Breadsticks
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4 1/2-ounce box sesame seed breadsticks
16-ounce package bacon
8-ounce container grated Parmesan


Preheat oven to 350 degrees F.
Wrap breadsticks in bacon. Place on cookie sheet and bake for 30 minutes.
Dredge through Parmesan while hot. Allow to cool and crisp, then serve.

Bon Appetit!
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Article by LizBeth

22- star3.png22- star3.png22- star3.png Astrological Concepts 22- star3.png22- star3.png22- star3.png
~ by LizBeth ~
Your Horoscope for the Month of October, 2013

Aries (21 March – 20 April)

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Taurus (21 April – 21 May)

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Gemini (22 May – 22 June)

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Cancer (23 June – 23 July)

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Leo (24 July – 23 August)

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Virgo (24 August – 23 September)

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Libra (24 September – 23 October)

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Scorpio (24 October – 22 November)

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Sagittarius (23 November – 21 December)

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Capricorn ( 22 December – 20 January)

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Aquarius (21 January – 19 February)

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Pisces (20 February – 20 March)

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Horoscope Source
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Article by LizBeth

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January 01 - 09 ~ Dog
January 10 - 24 ~ Mouse
January 25 - 31 ~ Lion
February 01 - 05 ~ Cat
February 06 - 14 ~ Dove
February 15 - 21 ~ Turtle
February 22 - 28 ~ Panther
March 01 - 12 ~ Monkey
March 13 - 15 ~ Lion
March 16 - 23 ~ Mouse
March 24 - 31 ~ Cat
April 01 - 03 ~ Dog
April 04 - 14 ~ Panther
April 15 - 26 ~ Mouse
April 27 - 30 ~ Turtle
May 01 - 13 ~ Monkey
May 14 - 21 ~ Dove
May 22 - 31 ~ Lion
June 01 - 03 ~ Mouse
June 04 - 14 ~ Turtle
June 15 - 20 ~ Dog

June 21 - 24 ~ Monkey
June 25 - 30 ~ Cat
July 01 - 09 ~ Mouse
July 10 - 15 ~ Dog
July 16 - 26 ~ Dove
July 27 - 31 ~ Cat
August 01 - 15 ~ Monkey
August 16 - 25 ~ Mouse
August 26 - 31 ~ Turtle
September 01 - 14 ~ Dove
September 15 - 27 ~ Cat
September 28 - 30 ~ Dog
October 01 - 15 ~ Monkey
October 16 - 27 ~ Turtle
October 28 - 31 ~ Panther
November 01 - 16 ~ Lion
November 17 - 30 ~ Cat
December 01 - 16 ~ Dog
December 17 - 25 ~ Monkey
December 26 - 31 ~ Dove

If you are a Dog : A very loyal and sweet person. Your loyalty can never be doubted. You are quite honest and sincere when it comes to your attitude towards working. You are a very simple person, indeed. Absolutely hassle free, humble and down-to-earth! That explains the reason why your friends cling on to you! You have a good taste for clothes. If your wardrobe is not updated with what is trendy, you sure are depressed. Popular and easy-going. You have a little group of dignified friends, all of them being quality-personified.

If you are a Mouse : Always up to some sort of a mischief! The mischievous gleam in your eyes is what makes you so cute and attractive to everyone. You are an extremely fun-to-be-with kind of person. No wonder people seek for your company and look forward to include you for all get-together's. However, you are sensitive which is a drawback. People need to select their words while talking to you. If someone tries to fiddle around and play with words while dealing with you, it is enough to invite your wrath. God bless the person then.

If you are a Lion : Quite contradictory to your name, you are a peace loving person. You best try to avoid a situation wherein you are required to fight. An outdoor person, you dislike sitting at one place for a long duration. Popular and easy-going. You are a born leader, and have it in you how to tactfully derive work from people. People love the way you always treat them. You love being loved, and when you receive your share of limelight from someone, you are all theirs.

If you are a Cat : An extremely lovable, adorable person, sometimes shy, with a passion for quick wit. At times, you prefer quietness. You love exploring various things and going into depth of each thing. Under normal circumstances you're cool but when given a reason to, you are like a volcano waiting to erupt. You're a fashion bird. People look forward to you as an icon associated with fashion. Basically, you mingle along freely but don't like talking much to strangers. People feel very easy in your company. You observe care in choosing your friends.

If you are a Turtle : You are near to perfect and nice at heart. The examples of your kindness are always circulated in groups of people. You, too, love peace. You wouldn't like to retaliate even to a person who is in the wrong. You are loved due to this. You do not wish to talk behind one's back. People love the way you always treat them. You can give, give and give love, and the best part is that you do not expect it back in return. You are generous enough. Seeing things in a practical light is what remains the best trait of you guys.

If you are a Dove : You symbolize a very happy-go-lucky approach in life. Whatever the surroundings may be, grim or cheerful, you remain unaffected. In fact, you spread cheer wherever you go. You are the leader of your group of friends and good at consoling people in their times of need. You dislike hypocrisy and tend to shirk away from hypocrites. They can never be in your good books, no matter what. You are very methodical and organized in your work. No amount of mess, hence, can ever encompass you. Beware, it is easy for you to fall in love.

If you are a Panther : You are mysterious. You are someone who can handle pressure with ease, and can handle any atmosphere without going berserk. You can be mean at times, and love to gossip with your selected group. Very prim and proper. You like all situations and things to be in the way you desire, which, sometimes is not possible. As a result, you may lose out in some relationships. But otherwise, you love to help people out from difficult and tight spots when they really need you.

If you are a Monkey : Very impatient and hyper! You want things to be done as quick as possible. At heart, you are quite simple and love if you are the center of attraction. That way, you people are unique. You would like to keep yourself safe from all the angles. Shall your name be dragged or featured in any sort of a controversy, you then go all panicky. Therefore, you take your precautions from the very beginning. When you foresee anything wrong, your sixth sense is what saves you from falling in traps. Quite a money minded bunch you people are!

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Article by LizBeth

~!~ Life in the 1500s~!~
by Tohtli and Wise Ork
Life in the 1500's, something interesting to ponder. Those were not "the good old days" we know from ingame!
Lead cups were used to drink ale or whiskey. The combination would sometimes knock them out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a "wake."

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England is old and small, and they started running out of places to bury people. So, they would dig up coffins and would take their bones to a house and reuse the grave. In reopening these coffins, one out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive. So they thought they would tie a string on their wrist and lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night to listen for the bell. Hence on the "graveyard shift" they would know that someone was "saved by the bell" or he was a "dead ringer."
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Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May and were still smelling pretty good by June. However, they were starting to smell, so brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the b.o.

Baths equaled a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it. Hence the saying "Don't throw the baby out with the bath water."
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Houses had thatched roofs. Thick straw, piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the pets... dogs, cats and other small animals, mice, rats, bugs lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof. Hence the saying, "It's raining cats and dogs."

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could really mess up your nice clean bed. So, they found if they made beds with big posts and hung a sheet over the top, it addressed that problem. Hence those beautiful big 4 poster beds with canopies. I wonder if this is where we get the saying "Good night and don't let the bed bugs bite"...
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The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt, hence the saying "dirt poor."

The wealthy had slate floors which would get slippery in the winter when wet. So they spread thresh on the floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on they kept adding more thresh until when you opened the door it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed at the entry way, hence a "thresh hold."
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They cooked in the kitchen in a big kettle that always hung over the fire. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They mostly ate vegetables and didn't get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes the stew had food in it that had been in there for a month. Hence the rhyme: peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old."
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Sometimes they could obtain pork and would feel really special when that happened. When company came over, they would bring out some bacon and hang it to show it off. It was a sign of wealth and that a man "could really bring home the bacon." They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and "chew the fat."
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Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with a high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food. This happened most often with tomatoes, so they stopped eating tomatoes...for 400 years.
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Most people didn't have pewter plates, but had trenchers - a piece of wood with the middle scooped out like a bowl. Trenchers were never washed and a lot of times worms got into the wood. After eating off wormy trenchers, they would get "trench mouth.
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Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the "upper crust".

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Article by Wise Ork

~!~ ANAGRAMS ~!~
collected by Konnan

This has got to be one of the cleverest things I've seen in awhile. Someone out there must be "deadly" at Scrabble. (Wait till you see the last one)!

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:

When you rearrange the letters:


When you rearrange the letters:

~!~ ***** ~!~

Article by MsKonnan

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Q - What does a monster wear when it rains?
A - His ghoul-oshes.

Q - How did the monster predict his future?
A - With a horror-scope.

Q - What did the monster do when he lost his hand?
A - He went to a second hand store.

Q - Why wouldn't the skeleton cross the road?
A - Because he didn't have any guts.

Q - What happened to the vampire who tried to gain weight by eating more?
A - It didn't work... it was all in vein.

Q - What is in the red blood cells of monsters?
A - Hemogoblin !!!

Q - What is a vampire's favorite fruit?
A - Neck tarines.

Q - Why couldn't the skeleton go to the dance?
A - Because he had no body to take !

Q - What did the sign in the Egyptian funeral home say?
A - "Satisfaction guaranteed or double your mummy back".

Q - What kind of mistakes do ghosts make?
A - Boo Boos.

Q - Why couldn't the mummy attend the meeting?
A - He was all tied up.

44. Q - What kind of car do ghosts drive?
A - A "Booick" !!!

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Source: Halloween Jokes

~!~ ***** ~!~

Article by LizBeth

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~!~ ***** ~!~

Article by LizBeth
Gustav Mahler Symphony no. 1 Funeral March to set the mood.
It is Just a Figment of Your Imagination
~ LizBeth ~

They move silently among us. Sometimes we hear them – or think we do. A whisper when the wind blows. A faint giggle when nobody is around. Things that go bump in the night that will just startle you. In the next instant, complete silence and we are left to wonder if we only imagined it.

Ghosts may manifest as nothing more than an out-of-place shadow, a smoky shape swirling past, a tap on the shoulder, or a soft voice speaking a single word. Often just one person witnesses this type of paranormal event that is over so swiftly. Things are out of kilter for a fraction of a second. The next moment, everything is normal again.

Do you doubt that there are ghosts among us? If you do, that is fine. In the spirit of Halloween, hopefully, you will be entertained by the stories below. The one posted here is an urban legend ghost story. But the most interesting of all is the link that will direct you to the stories posted by fellow clan mates regarding their personal encounters with the extramundane.

Fix yourself a cup of cocoa, tea, or coffee, and get yourself comfortable. See which story would give you the most goose bumps. Oh, and if you feel someone breathing on the back of your neck, do not be alarmed. It is probably just a ghost reading over your shoulder. Octoner 2014 044.gif

The Black Cat’s Message
A Texas Halloween Story

Excerpted from Spooky Southwest
Retold by
S.E. Schlosser

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I came home late one night after work and found my wife Ethel puttering about the kitchen with a big yellow cat at her heels.
      “And who is this?” I asked jovially.
      “This is our new cat,” said Ethel, giving me a hug and a kiss to welcome me home. “She just appeared at the kitchen door and wanted to come in. None of the neighbors know where she came from, so I guess she’s ours. It will be nice to have some company around the house.”
      I bent down and scratched the yellow cat under the chin. She purred and stretched.
      “Well, I think our income can stretch far enough to feed three,” I said.
      My son had taken over my job at the mercantile and my wife and I were enjoying a leisurely old age. I liked to keep busy though, and so I spent a few hours every day cutting and hauling wood to be used at the mill.
      I went out to milk the cow, and when I came back in, Ethel gave the cat some cream in a saucer.
      We sat on the porch after dinner, and the cat sat with us.
      “You are a very nice kitty,” I said to her. She purred loudly.
      “Donald,” Ethel said. She sounded worried. I turned to look at her. “The neighbors acted rather oddly when I told them about the cat. They seemed to think she was a ghost or a witch of some sort, transformed into a cat. They told me to get rid of her.”
      “A witch?” I asked, and laughed heartily. “Are you a witch, little cat?”
      The cat yawned and stretched. Reluctantly, Ethel started to laugh with me. It seemed such a ludicrous notion. We sat watching the beautiful sunset, and then took ourselves to bed.
      The cat quickly became an essential part of our household. She would purr us awake each morning, and would beg for cream when I brought in the morning’s milking. She followed Ethel around supervising her work during the day and would sit by the fire at night while we read aloud.
      The days became shorter as autumn approached, and often I would work until nearly sunset, cutting and hauling wood. One night in October, I didn’t finish hauling my last load until dusk. As soon as I had piled the last log, I started down the road, hoping to get home before dark since I had not brought a lantern with me. I rounded a corner and saw a group of black cats standing in the middle of the road. They were nearly invisible in the growing dark.
      As I drew nearer, I saw that they were carrying a stretcher between them. I stopped and rubbed my eyes. That was impossible. When I looked again, the stretcher was still there, and there was a little dead cat lying on it.
      I was astonished. It must be a trick of the light, I thought. Then one of the cats called out, “Sir, please tell Aunt Kan that Polly Grundy is dead.”
      My mouth dropped open in shock. I shook my head hard, not believing my ears. How ridiculous, I thought. Cats don’t talk.
      I hurried past the little group, carefully looking the other way. I must be working too hard, I thought. But I couldn’t help wondering who Aunt Kan might be. And why did the cat want me to tell her Polly Grundy was dead? Was Polly Grundy the cat on the stretcher?
      Suddenly, I was confronted by a small black cat. It was standing directly in front of me. I stopped and looked down at it. It looked back at me with large green eyes that seemed to glow in the fading light.
      “I have a message for Aunt Kan,” the cat said. “Tell her that Polly Grundy is dead.”
      The cat stalked passed me and went to join the other cats grouped around the stretcher.
      I was completely nonplussed. This was getting very spooky. Talking cats and a dead Polly Grundy. And who was Aunt Kan? I hurried away as fast as I could walk. Around me, the woods were getting darker and darker. I did not want to stay in that wood with a group of talking cats. Not that I really believed the cats had spoken. It was all a strange, waking dream brought on by too much work.
      Behind me, the cats gave a strange shriek and called out together: “Old man! Tell Aunt Kan that Polly Grundy is dead!”
      I’d had enough. I sprinted for home as fast as I could go, and didn’t stop until I had reached the safety of my porch. I paused to catch my breath. I did not want to explain to Ethel that I was seeing and hearing impossible things. She would dose me with caster oil and call the doctor.
      When I was sufficiently composed, I went into the house and tried to act normally. I should have known it wouldn’t work. Ethel and I had been married for thirty years, and she knew me inside and out. She didn’t say anything until after I’d finished the chores. Then she sat me down in front of the fire and brought me my supper. After I’d take a few bites and started to relax, she said, “Tell me all about it, Donald.”
      “I don’t want to worry you,” I said, reluctant to talk about what I had seen and heard on the way home.
      The yellow cat was lying by the fire. She looked up when she heard my voice, and came to sit by my chair. I offered her a morsel of food, which she accepted daintily.
      “I’ll worry more if you don’t tell me,” said Ethel.
      “I think maybe something is wrong with my brain,” I said slowly. “While I was walking home, I thought I saw a group of black cats carrying a stretcher with a dead cat on it. Then I thought I heard the cats talking to me. They asked me to tell Aunt Kan that Polly Grundy was dead.”
      The yellow cat leapt up onto the window sill. “Polly Grundy is dead?” she cried. “Then I am the Queen of the Witches!”
      She switched her tail and the window flew open with a bang. The yellow cat leapt through it and disappeared into the night, never to return.
      Ethel had to dump an entire bucket of water over my head to revive me from my faint.
      ‘The good news,” she told me when I sat up, dripping and swearing because the water was ice cold, “is that you have nothing wrong with your brain. The bad news is that our cat has just left us to become the Queen of the Witches. We’ll have to get another cat.”
      “Oh no,” I said immediately. “I've had enough of cats.”
      We got a dog.

Clan Quest members' personal ghost stories:Spookeh Storys?
Note: Special thanks to Kitty for allowing us to include the thread in this issue.
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Article by LizBeth