TriangleArrow-Left.svgOctober 2013 Issues of the Questaholic Magazine December 2013TriangleArrow-Right.svg

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November 2013 002.pngSanta's Guide to 99 Farming- The quickest way to level up and achieve your goals!

Welcome to my first guide. This guide was created to help fellow questers to achieve their quest cape by levelling smartly and checking off all quests so they can enjoy the lore with minimum fuss, as well as achieve their in game goals as fast as possible.

Some may ask, what is exactly the point of 99 farming? The highest levelled content is the wishing well fruit, which may as well be obsolete because they make a loss almost all the time. However, this is just one side of the story.

For starters, level 99 skills help a lot in dungeoneering, especially opening skill doors such as this one.

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Some say it's a pain to boost to open them, others say these doors are good xp.

You spend a lot less time scrambling to get a naturalist's potion together saving time and effort.

Moreover, the green cape matches a lot of your outfits, and you get to grow many colorful plants and trees throughout your game play experience, brightening up landscape, giving you trees to cut without competition from others, free fruits, lots of money from herb collecting which may even pay for your 99 eventually.

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Note that using allotments, flowers and herbs is not recommended before level 31 farming.

1-31 (Starting out)
As players start at Burthorpe now, there is a disease free potato patch south of the troll warzone, near the cow pens. You can buy potato seeds and start planting and wait there for the crops to grow. Weeds can be raked for experience as well. As soon as you get to level 5,you can proceed to buy onion seeds and go to the falador allotment patch to plant them. Be sure to rake the patches you do not use, in order to get more weeds to make compost. I stress, however, this is the slowest, among the 4 methods, to level from 1 to 31 farming, but it is a good choice if you start off a new account.

Proceed to the grand exchange, buy and plant the highest levelled allotment, flower and herb patches you can, until you reach level 31 farming. You do not need to pay farmers for these. You need 3 seeds per allotment patch.

Farming level/ Type of Allotment/ Experience per harvest
5/ Onion/ 10.5
7/ Cabbage/ 11.5
12/ Tomato/ 14
20/ Sweetcorn/ 19

Farming Level/ Flower/ Experience per harvest
2/ Marigold/ 47 (Protects potatoes, onions, tomatoes)
11/ Rosemary/ 66.5 (Protects our cabbages)
24/ Nasturnium/ 111 (Protects watermelons, which we are not growing)

Farming Level/ Herb/ Experience per harvest
9/ Guam/ 22.5
14/ Marrentill/ 15
19/ Tarromin/ 18
26/ Harralander/ 24

1-31 (Without quests, expensive)

Buy bagged plant 1's from the garden supplier at falador, plant them at your house in building mode, remove, rinse and repeat. Each plant gives 31 farming xp and 31 construction xp each.

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1-31 (Without quests, 28 summoning required)

However, if you have 28 summoning, you can buy a compost mound pouch and generate compost scrolls, buy a lot of buckets from the garden suppliers' and start filling them. Filling compost gives 4.5 xp each bucket, supercompost gives 9 xp each bucket. For every scroll you use, you get a full bin of compost or supercompost which you can fill your buckets for good xp.

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The fastest method, from 1- 31, however, is still doing quests.
1- 17: Fairy Tale I (2,500)
17- 25: Forgettable Tale of theDrunken Dwarf (5,000)
25-31: Garden of Tranquility (5,000)

The quests would give you ample experience on the fundamentals of this skill as well as experience in other skills. You can refer to my quest guide for farming HERE.

16- icon exclaim.gif Skill Guide Formula: What to Plant?

The brackets include the level required, further explanation below if necessary. I have excluded explanation for herbs, as I believe you all should know how they work. Plant A to H, if possible for the best experience.

A)Highest Levelled Tree, x5
B)Highest Levelled Fruit Tree, x6
C)Highest Levelled Herb, x5
D)Poison Ivy (70) or Barberry (77) x3
E) Calquat x1 (72)
F)Morchella Mushroom x1 (74)
G)Spirit Tree (83)
H)Spirit Tree #2 (86) + Potato Cactus (86)
Check the Jade Vine!

At 31 farming, you would be able to plant 2 new types of trees: Willow trees and Apple trees. Here is where you should start the conventional way of farming.

Below are the farming patch locations for fruit trees and regular trees. Only the viable methods are stated, the rest take far too long and should not be used.

Wood tree patch locations:
You unlock all 5 of the patches without quest requirements.

1. East of Lumbridge general store- With the lumbridge event, the patch was shifted around. Lodestone teleport.
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2. Varrock Castle Courtyard- Ring of Wealth/ Spirit Tree (after tree gnome village quest)
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3. Falador Park- Falador lodestone, run east.
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4. Taverley, beside pet shop- Falador lodestone.
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5. Gnome Stronghold- Spirit tree, run south (after tree gnome village quest). If you haven't done tree gnome village quest, don't bother with this patch as it takes too far to walk to.
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Fruit tree patch locations:
6 Patches, 1 accessible after starting MEP I.

1. Gnome Stronghold- Spirit tree (after tree gnome village quest).
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2. East of Catherby- Catherby Lodestone.
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3. West of Tree Gnome Village Maze- Spirit tree to tree gnome village, Elkoy as guide out of maze/ Yanille lodestone, run north.
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4. North of Brimhaven- Teleport to house in brimhaven or brimhaven tablet after completion of Love Story/ Port sarim lodestone, take charter ship to Brimhaven.
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5. Herblore Habitat- Juju teleport spiritbag/ Witchdoctor mask (after completion of HH).
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6. Lletya- Elf teleport crystal.
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Trees are your way to 99 farming efficiently. Below is a table of what you need to plant, in order to get 99 farming the most efficiently. Always pay farmer unless otherwise stated. After checking experience,

Trees/Level Required/Payment/Time taken to fully grow/Exp for planting and checking health:

Willow/ 30/ 1 Basket of Apples/ 4 hours 40 minutes/25 and 1,456
Maple/ 45/ 1 Basket of Oranges/ 5 hours 20 minutes/ 45 and 3,403
Yew/ 60/ 10 cactus spines, do not pay*/ 6 hours 40 minutes/ 81 and 7,070
Magic**/ 75/ 25 coconuts/ 8 hours/ 145 and 13,768

*They are about 3k each, which means 30k per patch and 150k extra payment every day. They do not make so much a difference as only about 1 in 10 yew tree die from disease due to not paying. The savings in the long run is worth it.
**If you are on a budget, do not plant this at all, stick with yew trees all the way to 99. 25 coconuts amount to 75k, which equals 375k per day on top of the price of magic seeds which are 170k each. Yew seeds are a lot cheaper, at 67k each.

General Guidelines:
If you can earn between 1 and 2 million coins per hour, plant the highest levelled tree, up to yew trees. If you earn less, plant maples all the way to 99.
If you can earn about 2 million coins or more per hour, plant the highest levelled tree.
Plant the highest levelled tree you can, up to yew. If you feel like spending vast amounts of cash on just a skill, go ahead and plant magic trees.
I stress again to always, always, pay the farmer to look after your tree unless stated otherwise.

Fruit Trees/ Level Required/Payment/Time taken to fully grow/Exp for planting and checking health:
Apple/ 27/ 9 sweetcorn/ 16 hours/ 22 and 1,200
Banana/ 33/ 4 Baskets of Apples/ 16 hours/ 28 and 1,750
Orange/ 39/ 3 Baskets of Strawberries/ 16 hours/ 36 and 2,470
Curry/ 42/ 5 Baskets of Bananas/ 16 hours/ 40 and 2,907
Pineapple/ 51/ 10 Watermelons/ 16 hours/ 57 and 4,606
Papaya/ 57/ 10 Pineapples/ 16 hours/ 72 and 6,146
Palms/ 68/ 15 Papayas*/ 16 hours/ 111 and 10,150

*15 papayas cost 45k, but you can be partially self sufficient:
At level 68 farming or higher, if you are on a budget, you can plant 4 papayas and 2 palm trees per cycle, assuming you have unlocked the elf land fruit tree patch. Oh, and use a giant ent familiar (78 summoning) for every trip as well, and pray you get more fruits so you pay less money to train.

General Guidelines:
Papayas and palms cost almost the same, xp/gp. The guide is that if you can't earn more than you spend on fruit tree seeds plus payment in a day, you should downgrade to the next best fruit tree to plant. Unless of course you are willing and able to pay more.

1. Bush patches are one of the extremely underrated farming exp gainers in game. The 4th bush patch at Kingdom is too far and not worth the trip.

a. West of Champions' Guild- Combat bracelet teleport/ Varrock Lodestone
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b. Rimmington- Teleport to house/ Rimmington teleport after Love Story quest.
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c. South of Ardougne- Ardougne cloak to Kandarin Monastery.
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At level 70, you should add poison ivy bushes to your farm run. They give 600 xp per health check, have a cycle of 2 hours and 40 minutes. They also don't need farmer's payment. For every bush you get about 1,000 xp in total. There are 3 bush patches in game. Technically, you can check their health once every 2 herb runs, providing a nice bonus.

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At level 77, you could swap out poison ivy with barberry seeds. They grow in 3 hours 20 minutes, and each seed can provide about 2,000 farming xp. You can get additional agility xp per harvest as well. The only drawback is you need 15 hammerstone hops per payment, which may be quite hard to find, considering nobody ever plants hops.

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Never do wishing well bushes. They are never worth the investment, you need to pay to open every fruit you get. For example, if you have a total level of 2,000, you need to pay 385,000 coins to open the fruit which may give you a random yield in items. Some of the items aren't even sellable at grand exchange medium prices. You need to pay wildblood hops as well, which are hard to find.

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Jagex's money sink, proven ineffective.

2. Jade Vines

Jade vines are accessible after Back to My Roots, after 53 farming. You should check Jade Vines every so often, and check it twice every day, so you get farming xp (1,500) per day and slayer xp (2,500) 3 hours later after it becomes wild. This bit of experience counts if you are under a budget. If not, don't bother, as the wild jade vine takes quite long to kill if you don't have a dragon hatchet.

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3. Potato cactus

At 86 farming, you can plant it at the cactus patch beside the Al Kharid lodestone. Payment is cheap, only 10 watermelons. You do not need to pay if you completed hard Desert Tasks. Time taken: 9 hours 20 minutes. It gives about 3,500 xp per seed. Easily overlooked but good xp for cheap.

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4. Morytania Mushrooms

74 farming required, you need to have completed Morytania set, medium tasks or else it is not worth it. The tasks grant it free from disease. You can easily get 1,000 experience and 30k coins from the harvest, which takes only 4 hours. Use fairy ring CKS, other methods of travel are too slow and should be avoided.

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5. Calquats

72 farming required, cheap and good experience. Remember when I talked about poison ivy earlier? Yes, you grow them to pay for this. 12,096 xp per health check, at only 14k per seed, this is arguably one of the best methods to level up farming. Only thing is, it takes 21 hours, 20 minutes to grow.

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6. Spirit Trees

83 farming (78 w/pork pie) , 19,301 xp per health check and a new teleport location. After Prisoner of Glouphrie, you can plant a second one if you have 86 farming (81 w/pork pie). Payment: 5 monkey nuts, 1 monkey bar, 1 ground tooth (suqah). Locations: Port Sarim, Brimhaven and Etceteria (Not recommended to plant at Etceteria). 58 hours 40 minutes for tree to grow. If you can get the seeds from Kingdom Management, I say go ahead and plant it.

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7. Warbands

A dangerous D&D, offering supply crates with bountiful xp. Often know to make the game so much easier. A day of farm run can easily be replaced by one successful trip. 25 Farming supplies can easily get you 80k xp at level 80. You're better off referring to the Runescape wiki, as this is a farming guide, not a warband guide.

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Helpful Items to be used:
I have excluded all the unnecessary items, such as amulet of nature as I do not think allotments are a good source of experience.

1. Pork Pies. They provide +5 farming boost.
2. Magic Secateurs. 10% yield for herbs.
3. Falador Shield 2+. 10% Xp boost for the falador herb patch.
4. Explorer's Ring 3+. Closest teleport to the falador herb patch.
5. Ectophial. Teleport to the herb patch at morytania.
6. Ardougne cloak 1- Teleport to Kandarin Monastery, bush patch. If you don't have it there is no point in using that bush patch.
7. Ardougne cloak 3+. Teleport to the Ardougne herb patch.
8. Magic Watering Can. Unlimited supply of water to make tree seedlings.
9. Giant Ent Pouch (78 Summoning). Increases yield of fruit, bushes, potato cactus by 50%.
10. Juju Farming Potion. Extra herb yield. Makes torstol planting profitable.

The list of items:
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I believe in practicing what you preach. Here is my setup for a full farm run, back when I was getting 99 farming a few months back. I do the tree and fruit trees first, and throw away the empty pots so I have enough space for the berries and herbs later on. Be sure to add a teleport to bank.

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The one in red goes first. Those are 5 yew trees and they don't need any payment. I get supercompost from the leprachaun.
Next is the green one. Those are papaya tree saplings.
Next I run from the brimhaven fruit patch to the calquat patch and use up the blue box.
Next up the purple box. I'll go plant my 3 poison ivy seeds, note my ardougne cloak and combat bracelet. I forgot the rimmington tablet.
Lastly, the orange box. Explorer's ring 4, trollheim tablet, ectophial, juju potion and seeds.
Pink box: Remember the cash for charter ships if you need.

With that comes the end of my first guide, I wish you all the best in achieving 99 farming. 1- icon biggrin.png

Article by Santa Ends

~!~ ***** ~!~
Interview with Clan Quest's BOON: The Draziw!

From Wise Ork:
Hi 62- noob.gif, how are you doing?
I'm doing swell. Everyday above ground is a good day.

What is your favorite color?
I have always possessed an especially fond opinion for Yellow. With that said, I have recently developed an equal appreciation for Pink. I have been teased in the past by friends and family that a blushing Asian is perfect for me. (Excuse the implied racism  :lol!: .)

Why is your profile picture a fire extinguisher?
I have often hypothesized that there are two types of people. Race, religion, gender, nationality, education background, etc... all play no part in the determination of which type you are in my postulate. If I were to run into the room and scream, “WHERE IS THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER?” what would you do? I believe there are two types of people. The first ask, “Why?” The second either tells you where it is, or helps you find it if they don't know. There is an implied question that accompanies “Where is the fire extinguisher?” that some people have the ability to immediately understand, and others do not. When I ask my question I am actually saying, “There is an emergency. There is a Fire. I need a fire extinguisher to help resolve the emergency. WHERE IS THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER?” There is nothing wrong with being either an “asker” or an “understander”.... But I find it interesting how everyone fits into one of the two groups, and usually a person doesn't know which it is until an emergency happens. Sometimes life is better when you are surrounded by askers, sometimes life is better when surrounded by understanders. I have a fire extinguisher to symbolize that postulate.

You knew I was going to ask this: IRL picture? :face: (not of a fire extinguisher 1- icon biggrin.png )
I provided a few videos of me... Hopefully they will suffice.

Tell us more about your IRL job and/or show us some of your best creations
The majority of my job is managerial. I tell people where to go or what to do, and I handle management of existing and possible client by organizing a sales force and directing sales endeavors. You asked me to show some of my creations, unfortunately... I usually don't take pictures. I was strongly involved in this:
I have also worked in an assortment of other projects including:

From MsKonnan10:
Hey, Draz! How do you rate a second follow-up interview? Can you answer this without using that word 'Awesome' ?
It's a real honor, and I hope that it will allow me to get in touch with some of the newer members who may not be as familiar with me as some of our older members. My inactivity has resulted in my becoming a myth, a fable told to bad children who won't eat their vegetables or go to bed at their bedtime. Hopefully this interview, and the answers I give will make everyone know me a little bit better (or make the fables more scary! mwahahaha)

In your last interview you talked about playing RuneScape back in 2003, and the group you called your clan mates then. Tell us about those times compared to now.
The game is way “easier” now. With the GE and all the other aspects of the game, the NEED for friends has diminished within the aspect of the game. What does that mean? If you have friends in the game, it's because you want them, not because you need them.

This is a big deal. Clans existed in the past because they made playing the game much easier. Now they exist because people like each others company. It makes running a clan harder now, because there is less of an incentive to participate, BUT it also makes the members of clans now much friendlier and loyal.

When did you become a Player Mod? Why do you think you were chosen for that?
September 21st, 2010.

My involvement in the clan community and more importantly, my proposed clan updates (which I helped to design (as some of the older clan members remember)) which would eventually take place in the game- granted me an “important” spot in the global gaming community that the Community Management Team felt should be afforded a moderator position. I only have 10,000+ posts on the RSOF and have been involved with some of the most successful clans in the game's history.

So much for the past...what do you most like about RuneScape now? That 'suttle humor' is still in the game, isn't it?
Well... as you may have noticed, I haven't been playing much. I think that much of the innocence which used to be a primary focus for runescape has shied away over time. Back in 2008ish, there was a company decision to change the focus audience for the game, and with it, generate content and host a game designed for an older crowd. Necessary, given the age of the average player is increasing as all players age and mature while they play, but foolish, in that the game sacrificed what made it unique to compete with games that already sell what Runescape is trying to become. I'll give an example. Nintendo sells games like Mario, Pokemon, etc. Characters and products that are “innocent”. There is an unfortunate truth in the gaming world, sex and violence sells. Runescape has shifted from a Nintendo like product towards a heavier game.... and it makes me sad.

This summarizes my opinion:

Still, I love the extreme details of the lore for this game. The game is very deep in content, compared to most other MMOs, and that makes it pretty freaking awesome. Name another game with 100+ quests, lol.

Have you any predictions for the future of RuneScape and particularly for Clan Quest?
I think that the two are separate. I am 100% certain, that if Runescape closed today, Clan Quest will still exist in 20 years.

Runescape has been suffering from the same issues the rest of the gaming community is suffering from. There is too much competition and not enough customers. How many people actually play MMOs? I don't know, but the number doesn't grow as quickly as the number of available games does. I think that Runescape will continue to provide a quality gaming experience as long as it can, and I expect that Clan Quest will evolve with every development, but I also see Clan Quest expanding outside of the game. Even now, I have started professional relationships with various members of the clan. Some of our members are younger and just now entering society as professionals. We can utilize our contacts with each other to benefit ourselves in real life. Some of the older members of this clan are seasoned souls that possess the experience and wisdom us “young folk” badly needed. I love to hear their opinions on all aspects of my life, not just the game.

Maybe we will expand into other games, or maybe we will play runescape for 50 years while Jagex keeps the game going. I don't know what will happen in the game, but I do know that the relationships I have made during my time in this community will not die by my choice.

Is Brassica Prime still your favorite RuneScape god? (dumb question, eh?)
I have followed the first and second commandments.

Have you ever attempted to make a Balloon Creations cabbage big enough to wear? (Would it go with pink underwear?) 15- icon wink.gif
No. Everything goes with pink underwear. 15- icon wink.gif

Have you any photos of your TaeKwonDo training you would like to share, and when is that next big competition going to happen?
This is a video of the form (Katta, Poomsae, Hyeong, Pattern) I performed at the event. I don't have any good videos because my camera man didn't know how to use the camera (apparently) as is evident by the fact they started filming this right as I started, not me walking up or bowing or anything....

The next big competition? Unsure, season resumes January 1st, but I am not in training at the moment, too busy with other obligations.

Have you ever traveled outside the United States?
Yes. Various parts of Europe and Africa (I was arrested for International Car theft (no joke) upon entering customs in Tangier, Morocco. That story would take me 15 pages to tell though, and isn't interesting. Suffice to say, I don't want to be imprisoned there...) I have also been to Canada on many occasions and I traveled to the Bahamas with my family when I was younger.

What part of the world would you most like to see?
The Core. Alas, gravity is a bitch.

If you could, would you like to travel in Space?
Duh. 6- icon cool.gif

From LizBeth:
Hey, Draz, how’s life been treating you?
oh... Life is swell. Everyday above ground is a good day. Besides, I can't complain, who would listen?

You’re finally going for you Law degree, awesome! What made you decide on that as your chosen career?
They wouldn't let me retire as a wealthy billionaire living off accrued interest. 3- icon sad.gif So... I figured I would use my ability to argue to my advantage.

What's a typical day like for you since you're a full time working student?
Same as before. Busy!

It might be too early to ask, but any idea as to what type of legal specialization you’re going to concentrate on?
No Idea.

Do you have any plans in the future to be involved in any governmental position?
I expect I will rule the world one day...

If you do, what position are you aspiring for?

Are you a Democrat or a Republican?
I find neither party's platform to be in alignment with my views. I usually vote Democrat on local issues, and Republican on larger tickets. I am an Anti-Federalist, and hold it to be irrefutable that a smaller government is better for society's needs. All evidence of current national and international governments leans in support of this.

What do you think of Obama care? Personally, I think it sucks, how about you?
I believe that Obama care is a perfect example of the issue with American Government in the modern era. This is an example of a law being passed into effect, while the congress admits that they have not read it, and are not familiar with the contents of said law. While economic theories and practical case studies of countries around the world have shown federalized healthcare to be BAD, the consequences of such a system usually require 20-30 years to begin becoming true problems, and the politicians who created this law will not be around to carry blame when it becomes an issue.

Why was the first government ever created, created? When the first government was founded, a bunch of cavemen farmers where having problems with other cavemen looting their crops. So... all the farmers got together and said, “We can't protect our land from looters on our own, but if we united into one group, we can stop them together!.” And so, a city was born. Down the way a few days, the city decided they wanted to trade with another city, but they couldn't reach each other. They created a state together with a few other cities, and built roads to all the cities in the State. They combined armies, created a commerce, and once a few states were formed, they combined to make a nation, and operated with one currency, and under one united banner.

What is the point of this story? Well.... Government was created to do what an individual cannot do on their own. And the larger governments were created to do what smaller governments cannot do on their own. When society codifies law, we have to consider the question, “Can someone do this on their own?” If the answer is yes, then the government cannot get involved. The truth of the matter is... Government was created by people who had something to protect that they didn't want to lose. If you don't have anything to lose, what purpose does government serve for you? Government only works for people who have something, or are striving to get something. If the government is giving away what people can get without the government, there is no incentive for that individual to get it on their own. And if they don't get it on their own, then they have nothing, and there is no need for the government, other than to provide them with what they could be getting on their own.


What’s your opinion on this government shutdown? Could it have been avoided?
It is irresponsible, and a horrible political maneuver. Coupled with the fact that neither party is willing to deal with the real issue (America being unable to pay it's current debts) makes this a serious example of how a two party system is failing my nation. This drama is going to come back in 10 weeks anyway....

What's your life philosophy?
Don't die.

With regards to RuneScape, are you totally retired now? Since you are so busy in real life, would we ever see you play again?
I am active here, just not in game. I don't know if I will play with the frequency I have in the past...

You've mentioned that you're an excellent whistler, is it alright to give us a sample via youtube? 1- icon biggrin.png
Meh... too much work.

Some random-out-of-the-blue questions:
If money cannot buy happiness, can you ever be truly happy with no money?

Well... given the terms of your proof, if money and happiness are not related, then having no money carries no affect to a person's potential happiness. Ask some Tibetan monks if they are happy. 15- icon wink.gif

I would make a note, money doesn't buy happiness, but it does buy a roof over your head, food in your belly, and a convertible Porsche for sunny days. :p

Why do you think people believe in 'truths' without evidence?
“Faith is the strength by which a shattered world shall emerge into the light.” -Helen Keller

I believe that a person should believe in things, not necessarily because they are true, but because they are things worth believing in. Things that if they were true, would make the world a better place, and if everyone believed, then the world really would be amazing.

True love does exist.
People are basically good.
Not all men are created equal, but everyone should be treated equal.
Good ALWAYS triumphs over Evil.

I don't need evidence to believe in those things, because those are things worth believing in.

What makes a good friend?
A bad enemy.

What defines you?
I don't understand the question. I am too complex to be defined with one simple definition.

Would you ever ride a motorcycle again?
I doubt it.

Your sheer determination to succeed in any goal that you set for yourself is quite astounding. Was there ever a time when you had failed at something? How did that make you feel? What had kept you from not giving up too easily?
Well there was this girl...

Is it worse to fail at something or never attempt it in the first place?
I would rather fail by trying and learn from the experience, than not have tried, and gained nothing.

To what extent do you shape your own destiny, and how much is down to fate?
That which hath been is named already, and it is known that it is man: neither may he contend with him that is mightier than he. Ecclesiastes 6:10

How much control do you have over your life?
“I do not believe in a fate that falls on men however they act; but I do believe in a fate that falls on them unless they act.” - Buddha He seems to have covered that issue.

If lying is wrong, are white lies okay?
Who said lying is wrong?

Is it easier to love or be loved?
beng loved requires no effort. Loving does.

What do you like/love about yourself?
Everything. I am awesome! :p

From Miss Alaska:
Hi Draz! We haven't really ever had a chance to know each other personally. I guess because I'm one of the 'newbies' of the clan. I haven't been around since its origins. Anyway what's your view on how the clan has evolved over the years? Have things surprised you?
How do I feel about how the clan has evolved? Well if I didn't like something I would be changing it... I think the cool thing about Clan Quest is that ANY member has the ability to change the clan towards what they want. This means that Clan Quest has become a hodgepodge mixture of many different people's intents for our community. If someone doesn't like something, a little elbow grease is all they need to fix it, and since a lot of our members don't mind elbow grease, we evolve a lot.

What's your ideal vacation?
Every December I usually take a vacation for two weeks in the middle of December. This usually involves me traveling to a location where I cannot be easily contacted, and then spending 14 days completing that years Assasin's Creed. Lol. 14 days of no phone or work is pretty awesome.

Favourite TV show?
Boston Legal. The Sopranos. Firefly.

What were you like as a kid?
The same as I am now. Less educated.

What's your favourite accent in the world? (mine's anything not Australian)
Midwest United States. I have a hearing impairment and accents make understanding speech difficult for me.

From Santa Ends:
You talked once about your multiple degrees and being in police school. You also take part in taekwondo competitions, own this clan and run a business at the same time. How do you hold everything together? Share your experience.
Duct tape. I do what I can when I can, and prioritize my available time to do everything that I need. School and the academy are all about educating myself. I think you should always concentrate on learning, and bettering yourself. It is a priority. Competing, running a business, playing with this clan- these are all things that have minimal expectations on a daily basis. A few hours here or there, but not 60 hours+ (unless that's how much I want to do).

Why are you so adamant about not getting any 99s?
In my opinion, the point of playing the game is the interaction with the other people. In the last few years, I have seen a shift in the community's focus of the game. While the goal of the game used to be to play the game's content, play with each other, etc... it has since become a game of “Max xp/hr”. A focus on maxing xp limits the interaction of individual players.

With that in mind, I do NOT want a 99, simply because obtaining a 99 is admitting that I have shifted from the old game which was an MMO, to the new game, which is focused on maxing. >=(

What are your goals?
I don't really have any big goals.

What do you think is your weak point?
Women... I have a biological imperative to notice their existence. They are distracting when I don't want to be distracted. :p

From Malchior67:
Hey Draz! I'm pretty new to the clan so know very very little about you. How long have you been playing RS?
I started in mid/late 2001.

What total and cb level are you?
2347 total. 193 combat. No 99s.

What's your favorite skill?
Slayer. 2- icon smile.gif

What's your least favorite skill?
I really dislike Summoning, lol.

Favorite/least favorite quest?
Romeo and Juliet is the only quest I ever used a guide for.... so.... I dislike it. BUT IT'S GONE!!!! Mwahahaha. Nobody consider the coincidence that my least favorite quest was removed from the game. >.>

I really like the pirate quest line.

How'd you pick your name?
Quoted from my original interview 2- icon smile.gif

Throughout my life, I have drafted many books and screenplays. My first among these is a chronicle of mythical lore centering on a few heroes as they struggle to uncover the past about the first and most powerful wizard in history. The man, so powerful in his magic, eventually became recognized as the first and best of his kind. Over time, society gave the title wizard to other magic wielders, and they inverted the first Wizard’s name to brand others who possessed similar skill. So… Draziw, gained a permanent spot in the magic community as the first Wizard. All others to follow after him wore his name (while backwards).

What most people don’t realize is that I carry the name Draziw in almost everything I do. While everyone in the clan quest community recognizes the name Draziw as my RuneScape name, I also utilize it in every other medium of entertainment and communication that I can. My car’s license plate is Draziw, my email is a combination of my gaming and real life nick names “Grandpa Draziw” (yes, most people in real life call me grandpa), my xbox- StarCraft- WarCraft- LazerQuest, wiki and every other games’ names are Draziw. I have always used the name as my tag, and I doubt that will change.

If you take anything away from my name though, please realize- I have a backward sense of humor. Draziw explains that fairly well.

Dearest Drazzykins,Could you please elaborate on the following photos?
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It seems to me that these photos speak for themselves. What elaboration can I provide that you don't already know?

Why are you pitching so many restaurants?
It's my job. Lol. The more restaurants I convince to use service the more money I make. I like money.

What is the dumbest thing you have ever seen someone do personally? Heard about? What is the dumbest thing YOU have ever done?
The dumbest thing I have ever seen personally isn't appropriate for this offsite. 1- icon biggrin.png

One of the dumbest things I have heard about. My father was driving up to one of his triplex properties when he saw two criminals carrying the refrigerator out of his apartment. The third floor apartment. They were carrying it down the exterior stairwell, so he proceeds to call 911, tell the operators on the line that he was going to put the phone on speakerphone and asks her to be silent, then parks his car as the two criminals finally make it to the ground. He runs up to them, “Oh my! I'm so sorry I am late! Thanks for delivering this for me, it goes in the third floor apartment up these stairs.” The two criminals proceed to carry the refrigerator BACK UP THE STAIRS and the cops arrive shortly thereafter.

I have never done anything dumb.

Do you travel around the US often? Ever make it to the southeast sometimes?
Yes I do. I visited Skills2Quest in North Carolina last summer. I have family in Florida.

What is the longest period of time that you have stayed awake for? Longest time you have slept?
I have pulled multiple 72+ hour days. I don't think I have ever slept more than 14 hours (and that was a day I was sick.).

Why does your location in your profile have two mistakes in it?
It doesn't. They are deliberate. I present enough information that a layman would not question it, but that a professional couldn't find me.

If you are slightly backward, how would you describe me? Have you, in your travels, met anyone both as strange and as lovable as I am?
Grotesquely Planetarian! 1- icon biggrin.png Gravitomic! Terran. You are one of a kind.

If you could take three people from any point in history to lunch (disregarding language barriers, the shock of being in another time period, and all of that), who would it be? Why?
First, John Locke. Because he could arguably be attributed as a leading force of change for the world in the last 300 years.
Second, Leonardo DaVinci, He's pretty fracking smart!
Third, Jesus. Purportedly the best magician ever.

Why did you turn Cros into a balloon?
That my good sir, is President Barrack Obama.

I went to Blimpy Burger because you suggested it. It was the best thing we did in Ann Arbor that day. (Did not like U of M) Name another restaurant in each of three other towns in the midwest (Indiana, Ohio, Wisconsin, Missouri, Illinois) you have found enjoyable. Try to avoid Major chains, I want local color.
Melt Bar and Grilled in Cleveland, Ohio. They have opened 3 locations within the last 5 years because of the success of the original store. Located in Cleveland.
Primo's Deli in Akron, Ohio. The Italian Sub is very tasty!
Boondock BBQ in Morgan County, Ohio (by Marrieta). Nom Nom.
Barking Dog Cafe in Indianapolis, Indiana. BURGER!!!!
DMK Burger Bar in Chicago, Illinois. Burgers, lol.
Glenn's Diner in Chicago, Illinois. Good breakfast.
Hopleaf Bar in Chicago, Illinois. No kids allowed, so this may not be for you.
Highway 61 Roadhouse in St. Louis, Missouri. Ribs.
Franks Diner in Kenosha, Wisconsin.

How many bones in your body have you broken?
No idea. 100ish 1- icon biggrin.png

Do you ever want to have children of your own?
Yes. Though I can't imagine having a daughter... I'd have to kill all the males born within 10 years of her in either direction. Maybe 20...

In court, would you rather Defend someone you know is Guilty, or Prosecute someone you think is Innocent?
A defense is a legal right. I would rather defend someone who is guilty. After all, if they are that guilty, the very best defense will still not ensure their freedom. Prosecuting an innocent seems a far worse than getting a guilty man free.

“Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws.” -Plato

The guilty man will commit another crime and go to jail latter...

Where is the fire extinguisher.
Look left then up!

Article by Wise Ork

~!~Avant-Garde Poetry Corner ~!~

by Wise Ork

A world filled with war, the people are scared
For a battle is raging between the gods who once cared
Clashing swords and breaking bones
't is no longer the kings to have heirs to their thrones
Friends fight each other to prove which god is best
While He just spectates at their biggest test
Holding the Staff with the Stone by his side
Soon the world will see His true might
And when darkness comes with the help of Zanaris
He will ascend and claim the world as his

~!~ ***** ~!~

Article by Wise Ork

The Demise of the Red Axe
by Miss Alaska
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One of the longest running quest series in RuneScape has reached an end. The Rise of the Red Axe series started out the usual way quests do, with the adventurer accidentally stumbling into the business of others and mixing themselves up with their problems - ultimately agreeing to help them out. The humble beginning grows into a much more sinister plot as the series develops. We meet some memorable characters and begin a friendship with the heroic and determined protagonist, Veldaban. But let's revisit the origins of this series, and follow the adventurer's journey all the way to Birthright of the Dwarves, the grandmaster quest released this early October.
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The Giant Dwarf

We enter the city of Keldagrim for the first time and accept the offer of the dwarven boatman to go up the river to the city in his ship. As we travel along the River Kelda, the boatmen happens to lose control of his boat and accidentally crashes into the massive statue of King Alvis, the last dwarven king who lived 500 years ago. The Black Guard promptly arrests us, and we are introduced to Commander Veldaban.

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Finding ourselves in an awkward situation, we are given the task by the commander to repair the statue. First we must choose a company from the Consortium (the society of dwarven parties who govern the city) to join. The only company we cannot join is the Red Axe, as they don't permit humans as members. After doing a few small jobs for the chosen company, they let us in and even allow us to attend one of the Consortium meetings. At the meeting, the directors discuss the statue and whose head it will have the likeness of. The Red Axe director argues that his head should be the one featured on the statue as his company's the largest and wealthiest in Keldagrim.

However, we interfere and vouch for our company director to be the one the statue is based on. The Red Axe director furiously storms out of the meeting, shouting out that the Consortium will regret this.

Forgettable Tale of a Drunken Dwarf

After Hreidmar leaves the city with the Red Axe, Commander Veldban asks us to find out what the future plans of the Red Axe director are. Our only lead is none other than the drunken dwarf. He starts waggling his tongue after we brew him a Kelda Stout, and then finally tells us about a boarded up mine cart trail south of the city. We take the mine cart after asking the company director to have the boards removed. Along the way we're confronted with a puzzle on the mine cart tracks, but continue on after fixing it. We arrive in a cave where we witness a peculiar conversation between Hreidmar, an ogre shaman and a henchman. It is revealed that the Red Axe actually paid the dwarven boatman to crash into the statue of the giant dwarf.

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Following another mine track puzzle, we land into a storeroom and discover interesting documents on the Red Axe. After a final puzzle, we enter another cave and see Hreidmar, the henchman and some gnomes from Arposandra. We overhear them discussing about some final experiments, and Hreidmar presents an army of Chaos Dwarves to the gnome emissary. We decide to return to Keldagrim immediately and tell Veldaban of what we have seen, but are obstructed by the ogre shaman, who quickly erases our memory of the event.

We find ourselves at the entrance of the mine cart trail, which has been boarded up once again. We don't have any recollection of what has just happened. Upon meeting with Veldaban, we tell him we want a kebab and then head over to the Laughing Miner Pub for a few beers.

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Forgiveness of a Chaos Dwarf

We meet up with Commander Veldaban again, and he tells us that tragically, more and more people are missing from Keldagrim. We assume that the Red Axe is behind it. Suddenly, the conference is interrupted by a Black Guard member informing Veldaban that Chaos Dwarves are attacking the watchtower. We hurry with Veldaban to the watchtower to defeat the remaining Chaos Dwarf on top of the structure. It drops a Grand Exchange slip upon death, and we discuss the meaning of this with Veldaban. He instructs us to go to the Grand Exchange to ask about the request indicated on the slip.

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After inquiring at the Grand Exchange, we are given a package with seemingly random and useless items contained in it. Returning to Keldagrim, we find Veldaban drinking in the Laughing Miner bar of Keldagrim East. He tells us he is angry because he has been taken off the investigation of the missing dwarves, simply because all the missing dwarves are residents of Keldagrim East - the derelict, underprivileged suburb of the city. The investigation has instead been handed to Lieutenant Brae, who in Veldaban's words is just "a girl with a weak will" that does whatever Supreme Commander Bisi tells her. We change the topic and talk to Veldaban about the contents found in the package, giving him a Guardsman's stout, a very strong ale. He becomes drunk and decides to confront Supreme Commander Bisi nonetheless. They have a heated argument, and Commander leaves afterward to go to bed and sleep.

At this point we decide to figure out what the link is between the recent Chaos Dwarf activity and the missing Keldagrim citizens. We investigate the watchtower, using items from the package to help us find clues, eventually being led to a secret mine cart cave with a strangely familiar control panel (we can't remember the similar panel used in Forgettable Tale of a Drunken Dwarf as our memory had been wiped). We notice that the green and yellow stones that were in the package are used to operate the mine carts, but we need assistance of another person to make them work. We leave to bring Veldaban to the mine cart cave, and together, solve the track puzzles. Reaching the other side of the maze, we find a cell containing all the missing dwarves. We set them free but one refuses to leave until she finds her husband Brunolt, who had been taken away by Chaos Dwarves.

We go through a tunnel with Veldaban to search, and arrive inside a cave to see Brunolt being brainshwashed by Grunsh the ogre shaman. We both watch in horror as he is turned into a Chaos Dwarf before our eyes. Veldaban screams "Hilda!" upon seeing this, blowing our cover. We run and hide in a safe room, and Commander Veldaban finally tells us about him and his love interest Hilda. Both she and Veldaban had stumbled upon the secret cave looking for her missing brother, but were caught. As Veldaban was a commander in the Black Guard, he couldn't just suddenly go missing; but Hilda was considered an unimportant resident from Keldagrim East. So while Veldaban had his memory erased, Hilda was instead turned into a Chaos Dwarf.

Off topic:
For the lore text on Veldaban and Hilda, follow the link
-It's one of my favourites.

Colonel Grimsson, Hreidmar's henchman, reveals that Hilda was amongst the Chaos Dwarf battalion that attacked the watchtower earlier, and that none of the dwarves had returned, implying that she was killed. Upon hearing this, Veldaban vows to take his revenge on Grimsson. At this time we both find another escape route out of the cave using a tool from the package. We immediately run to the Consortium to report the situation. The company directors decide to post Colonal Grenda's Black Guard division at the entrance cave to the Red Axe's base to prevent the Chaos Dwarves from entering the city. While Veldaban thinks the Red Axe needs to be stopped at once, the Consortium directors don't believe the problem to be serious enough for a full assault, seeing as "no one important" has been kidnapped from the city yet. Veldaban replies that Hilda had been brainwashed and transformed into a Chaos Dwarf, and that he should be the one investigating the Red Axe. When unsuccessful in his appeal, Veldaban resigns from the Black Guard, throwing down his commander insignia to the floor in anger. However, he doesn't give up his fight against the Red Axe choosing to investigate without the help of the Black Guard now.

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King of the Dwarves

On meeting Sven the miner, we're taken into the Lava Flow mine to be shown around. Once inside, we notice a strange figure hanging about and realise it's a Chaos Dwarf! Without warning, it dramatically explodes, damaging the mine's interior and injuring many of the workers as rubble buries them. We quickly try to save a group of miners from the aftermath of the explosion, but the damage done by the Chaos Dwarf was severe. Following this event, riots start to break out in Keldagrim questioning the safety of the city. In response, Hreidmar convinces the protesters outside the Consortium that the age of monarchy must return to dwarven society in order for their continuing existence. Determined to find and restore the true heir to the throne, Veldaban, ourselves and Meike, the leader of the Monarchist Society, set out to discover who the rightful king is. After uncovering some ancient records, we find that unfortunately, Hreidmar was next in line for the throne. To prevent Hreidmar from succeeding, Meike works on altering the family tree.

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Meanwhile, as we head into Barendir caves with Veldaban to investigate further, we are confronted by Colonel Grimsson. He mocks Veldaban about the loss of his girlfriend, and Veldaban suddenly realises that Grimsson had been brainwashed by the Red Axe into working for them. He teases him about it, angering Grimsson. In a rage Grimsson begins to attack Veldaban. We assist Veldaban in defeating him, and watch as Grimsson retreats further back into the cave where the army of Chaos Dwarves resides.

Figuring that we will need reinforcements before fighting the Red Axe army, we meet the trolls living inside the Barendir caves and find our friend, My Arm, among them. To gain the allegiance of the trolls, we first pass a test of strength, lifting a huge boulder above our head. After proving our worth, the troll warlord, Pretty Flower, agrees to help in the fight against the Chaos Dwarves.

Once we return to Keldagrim with Veldaban, the Consortium announces that it will be stepping down from power and henceforth, be acting as an advisor body to the new king. To prevent Hreimar ruling the city, Meike had to change the records so that they showed Veldaban to be next in line for the throne, and as a result, he is crowned instead of Hreidmar. Furious at this, Hreidmar threatens to invade the city with his army of Chaos Dwarves, but the Black Guard intervenes, informing him that his army has been defeated by the trolls. Veldaban orders Hreidmar's immediate arrest, however, he manages to escape through the crowd. Veldaban then unwillingly takes the crown from Meike, and is declared the King of the Dwarves.

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Birthright of the Dwarves

Concerned about what he should now be doing as king of the entire Dwarven Realm, Veldaban tries to focus on his duties, but cannot stop dwelling on the imposing threat the Red Axe holds on Keldagrim. He decides to wipe them out entirely, once and for all, with the help of the trolls, the Black Guard and ourselves. He gives us three tasks to fulfill; first to interrogate four dwarves suspected of involvement with the Red Axe, then collect any new information by killing the Chaos Dwarves dwelling in Taverley Dungeon, and lastly to find something that can counteract the brainwashing magic used by the ogre shaman, Grunsh.

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Once all three tasks are completed, we are escorted to Barendir caves by Veldaban, where the Black Guards, the Mountain Trolls and Nulodion the dwarf are preparing for the assault on the Red Axe base. We are given five detonators by Nulodion, which he says will be useful in destroying the multicannons set up inside the Red Axe base. After firing our own cannon to open a tunnel through Barendir, we infiltrate the base. Dodging attacks from Chaos Dwarves and Dwogres, and destroying all five cannons, we rush towards Colonel Grimsson, who escapes the base in a rage on one of the mine carts. We pursue him with Veldaban, and end up in the next room to see Grunsh using his memory-erasing spell, which we deflect from ourself with the secret weapon (provided to us by the Watchtower Wizard). We fall into the memories of Hreidmar, Grimsson, Grunsh and Veldaban, and must fix the tampered memories before leaving. Once all the memories are restored, we re-appear in the Red Axe base with Veldaban.

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We return to Keldagrim immediately, but notice that things are amiss. There is no river, the giant statue is a depiction of Hreidmar, and no buildings exist save for the palace. When we both enter the palace, all the Consortium directors have been turned into Chaos Dwarves. To reach the throne room above, we must pretend to join the Red Axe company, and be granted passage past the Chaos Dwarves guarding the stairway. Once we enter the throne room, we see Hreidmar sitting on the Dwarven throne, and confront him with Veldaban. After briefly speaking, Hreidmar summons Colonel Grimsson to finish of Veldaban. We help Veldaban kill Grimsson as they duel to the death, but in a fury Hreidmar grabs his dragon battlestaff and casts a spell, turning himself, then Grimsson and Veldaban into Chaos Dwarves. In a grueling battle, we finally manage to kill Grimsson and Hreidmar once and for all. After the fight is over, we quickly attend to Veldaban, who is struggling to hold back his transformation into a Chaos Dwarf. Veldaban asks us to kill him before it is too late, letting him rest peacefully. We are given the choice to either grant Veldaban his death, or to make him fight the transformation and live.

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A cutscene plays showing the Black Guard, trolls and other dwarven citizens toppling the statue of Hreidmar, as Keldagrim becomes a safe place forever onwards. Back at the Consortium, the company directors hold a meeting to discuss who will govern the city from now on. We can either encourage the directors to let a king remain in power, or to pass the rule of Dwarven society back to the Consortium again. If we choose to keep a king ruling Keldagrim, Veldaban will continue in his position as the king, or if he was allowed to die, Drunken Dwarf III would be the next in line for the throne. If the Consortium was chosen while Veldaban still lived, he would willingly step down from his role as the leader of the city.

So concludes the series that began innocently enough with just a 'minor' boat crash, and ended with the reformation of an entire city, with the help of a very heroic dwarf.
Information was gathered from the RuneScape Wikia fansite, as well as the images used for this article.
~!~ ***** ~!~

Article by Miss Alaska

November 2013 053.pngRuneFest 3 Live Streams!November 2013 053.png

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If you haven't watched the live streaming of RuneFest 2013 on Twitch, you're a nutter!

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Seriously though, there has been some brilliant stuff presented at this year's RuneFest. It's something to sit down with some popcorn (or if you're like me, a mug of coffee), relax and enjoy watching. From our favourite, the lore and story behind the game, and where the plot of the Sixth Age is headed (presented by the lovely narrative designers of Jagex), to the one on one interviews with our favourite mods, to live Q&A's, to what RuneScape in year 2014 will be like, to the best costume at RuneFest '13, to sniffing the gnome.....(you'll need to watch the stream to see what I mean on that one).
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Couldn't afford a plane ticket to jolly old England? Problem Solved!
Click here for British accents ...and RuneScape things
(Remember, there's several other stream videos for RuneFest on the RuneScape channel. This is just the first one)

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Here's to another successful RuneFest launched by Jagex and here's hoping for many more to follow! Hope you all enjoyed watching RuneFest Live as much as I did 15- icon wink.gif

Images sourced from the RuneFest Twitter as well as Google naturally.
~!~ ***** ~!~

Article by Miss Alaska

~!~ Win8 Y U DO ~!~
by Wolfie
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Upon getting Windows 8 for the first time I noticed many many issues that overall made it completely unusable and just insanely annoying to use to the point where even the most simple of tasks was an incredible strain on my sanity. This is because Windows 8 was built from the ground up to be used on touch screen devices. ALL THE CONTROLS WERE MADE TO BE USEFUL ON TOUCH SCREEN DEVICES AND THEY USE THE SAME CONTROLS ON NON-TOUCH SCREEN DEVICES. Let that sink in. Windows 8 does not care that your computer may not be a touch screen device and you will get the same settings even if they are almost impossible for you to use, or serve no purpose what-so-ever. But fear not! I will show you how to make Windows 8 completely usable and even user friendly in what I like to call "The Windows 7.5 Experience".

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Trackpad Terrorism!

This is clearly the work of Satan (or Mod Stu). The most apparent problems with Win8 are located on the Trackpad. The trackpad is used for almost everything as the mouse is a key feature on computers for obvious reasons. Not one, but TWO different programs use the trackpad to make shortcuts on your computer. Windows 8 Gestures and the built in trackpad shortcuts are the offenders and the picture above shows what they do.
•The yellow arrows show that any motion from the right of the trackpad will open up the charms bars which appear over anything you are doing and shift focus away from it (a real pain while typing).
•The red arrows show any motion from the left of the trackpad will open up the switcher, once again jumping in front of anything you are working on.
•The black arrows show any motion from the top of the trackpad will open up the app bar, again getting in the way of whatever you are doing.
•The purple arrows show any motion from two fingers anywhere on the trackpad both going left or right will scroll your screen on you. This might not sound like a big deal but constantly losing your place is a huge pain, and it happens OFTEN because the right and left click buttons on the win8 trackpad are touch sensitive so if you move the cursor with one finger and click with another you are constantly making two points of contact on your trackpad.
•The pink arrows show any motion from two points of contact going towards each other will trigger the zoom shortcut. Once again this is very easily triggered because of the sensors in the right and left click buttons.
•The brown circles indicate that if you press down too hard the trackpad will click for you. This can happen anywhere on the trackpad so I just put a few circles up to show this.
•Believe it or not there are several more shortcuts I was too disgusted to try and put up.

So, the most used area of the computer has the most crap packed into it. What could possibly go wrong? By the way did I mention THERE IS NO SETTING TO TURN OFF WINDOWS GESTURES? Luckily there is a settings menu to turn off the trackpad shortcuts with and I found a simple hack to turn off the windows gestures. So here we go!

The fix:
•Open Control panel
•Change to large or small icon view (not grouped)
•Click "mouse"
•Click the "device settings" tab
•Click the "settings" button
•Uncheck everything but clicking
•Hit apply and your trackpad shortcuts are now disabled!
•Copy the following into a text file(.txt):

Windows Registry Editor Version 5.00
[HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Synaptics\SynTPEnh\ZoneConfig\TouchPadPS2\Right Edge Pull]
[HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Synaptics\SynTPEnh\ZoneConfig\TouchPadPS2\Left Edge Pull]
[HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Synaptics\SynTPEnh\ZoneConfig\TouchPadPS2\Right Edge Pull Extended Zone]
[HKEY_CURRENT_USER\Software\Synaptics\SynTPEnh\ZoneConfig\TouchPadPS2\Top Edge Pull]

•Save and close the text file.
•Rename it anything you want but change the file extension from .txt to .reg
•Ignore any warnings about changing filetype and ect
•Double click "whatever_you_named_it.reg"
•Restart your computer and windows 8 gestures and trackpad shortcuts will be disabled so you can now move your cursor without wanting to put your fist through a wall!

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Startorb Scandal!

Since the dawn of Windows 95 Windows users have been taught to use the start orb/start menu and for no good reason non touch screen users have had that replaced with a far inferior start page. It totally covers the monitor so you have no idea what is going on underneath it and is easily cluttered with tiles and loads a lot of motion crap that will just eat up ram on your computer for no good reason. There are free programs that can fix this but this is by far the best option and at just $3 for 2 lifetime licenses I would say that is more than affordable enough so without further ado...

The fix:
•Go to
•Download "Startisback"
•Test it out for 30 days
•If you like it then pay them $3 (they earned it) and give your spare license to a friend who will love you forever.
•If you somehow have a win8 laptop but can't pay $3 for some crazy reason Classic Shell does most of what start is back does and is free

Added benefits of start is back include disabling annoying win8 features like the start page, using custom start orbs (just search deviant art for more), and disabling the corner charm bar shortcuts that open at horrible times.

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Can't touch this, touch screen!

You know what every non touch screen user needs? A touch screen keyboard that starts every time you turn the computer on and never does anything but sit there and take up space! I shouldn't have to explain why adding a touch screen keyboard ON EVERY NON TOUCH SCREEN DEVICE is an act of pure stupidity.

The fix:
Press "Windows key" + "W"
Type "Services" and press "Enter"
Scroll down to "Touch screen keyboard and handwriting panel"
Double click and change it from "Automatic" to "disabled"

Lockscreen lockout!

For some reason Windows thought it would be fun if every time you turned your computer on you had to click once to get passed a lock screen just to log in... I don't even know, and I have given up trying to understand them at this point so why don't we just skip to the part where I tell you how to fix it.

The fix:
•Press the Windows key (key with the windows logo on it) and "R" at the same time
•Type "Regedit.exe" and hit "enter".
•Go to HKEY_LOCAL_MACHINE\SOFTWARE\Policies\Microsoft\Windows\CurrentVersion
•Click "Personalization" under "CurrentVersion", if it doesn't exist right click "CurrentVersion" and select "create new key" and name it "Personalization". Click it after creation.
•On the right-hand side under "(Default)" right click any blank space and select "New>DWORD (32-bit) Value)" and name it "NoLockScreen".
•Double click "NoLockScreen" and set its value to "1".

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Hibernation Hiatus!

For some mysterious reason Win 8 decided to leave all the old power down options and only disable hibernate (The one I use all the time because it turns the machine off to save on power cost, and doesn't close any of the windows I have open). Why only disable hibernate? God only knows at this point but anyways here we go.

The fix:
•Right click the plugged in/battery power icon on your taskbar and select "power options"
•Click "Change what the power buttons do"
•Click "Change settings that are currently unavailable"
•Scroll down
•Check the "Hibernate" box
•Click Save changes

Congratulations! Your computer now runs at the lightning fast speed of windows 8 with all the functionality of windows 7!

~!~ ***** ~!~

Article by Wolfie

22- star3.png22- star3.png22- star3.png Astrological Concepts 22- star3.png22- star3.png22- star3.png
~ by LizBeth ~
Your Horoscope for the Month of November, 2013

Aries (21 March – 20 April)

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Taurus (21 April – 21 May)

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Gemini (22 May – 22 June)

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Cancer (23 June – 23 July)

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Leo (24 July – 23 August)

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Virgo (24 August – 23 September)

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Libra (24 September – 23 October)

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Scorpio (24 October – 22 November)

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Sagittarius (23 November – 21 December)

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Capricorn ( 22 December – 20 January)

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Aquarius (21 January – 19 February)

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Pisces (20 February – 20 March)

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Source: Horoscopes
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Article by LizBeth

What's Your Personality Color?

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Colors can tell a lot about one’s personality. Color tests have been around for a long time and we think they can be a very accurate tell on your personality. See if the personality characteristic matches your true personality!

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Having a personality color orange means you are warm, optimistic, extroverted and often flamboyant. You are friendly, good-natured and a generally agreeable person. You are assertive and determined rather than aggressive – having a personality color orange means you are more light-hearted and less intense than those who love red. You thrive on human social contact and social gatherings, bringing all types together. As a personality color orange you enjoy partying and socializing and planning all types of social events – orange people are the life of the party, the uninhibited performer! You are often the loud talker in a group.

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Having a personality color red identifies you as extroverted and optimistic, courageous and confident. You are action oriented and physically active – sex is a necessity to you – you have strong survival instincts. With a favorite color red, you like to be the center of attention – in fact all reds crave attention – other people are drawn to the vitality and sense of excitement you emit. As a personality color red, you are stimulating to be with and you radiate a great deal of energy.

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With a personality color green you are a practical, down-to-earth person with a love of nature. You are stable and well balanced or are striving for balance – in seeking this balance, you can at times become unsettled and anxious. Having a personality color green means you are kind, generous and compassionate – good to have around during a crisis as you remain calm and take control of the situation until it is resolved. You are caring and nurturing to others – however you must be careful not to neglect your own needs while giving to others.

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Having a personality color black means that prestige and power are important to you. You are independent, strong-willed and determined and like to be in control of yourself and situations. As a lover of black you may be conservative and conventional – black is restricting and contained. You may be too serious for your own good – bring some color into your life to lighten you up – life should be fun. You may appear intimidating to even your closest colleagues and friends, with an authoritarian, demanding and dictatorial attitude.

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Having a personality color brown means you are honest, down-to-earth and wholesome, salt of the earth people with both feet planted firmly on the ground. You are steady and reliable and quietly confident. You are friendly and approachable, genuine and sincere. With a personality color brown you have a keen sense of duty and responsibility – you take your obligations very seriously.

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Note: Rarely is the personality color white a favorite color from childhood – a favorite color white tends to become a favorite at a time when you are going through a transitional period in your life, preparing for new beginnings or seeking a new direction in one or more areas of your life. The following descriptions will apply to both those who love white and those going through a transitional time, although the latter may be a temporary display of the following qualities until the transitional period has passed. This transitional time may last for weeks or years. Having a personality color white means you are neat and immaculate in your appearance, in the presentation of your home and in your car, almost to the point of being fanatical. You have impeccable standards of cleanliness and hygiene and you expect others to adhere to your high standards. You are far-sighted, with a positive and optimistic nature. You are well-balanced, sensible, discreet and wise.

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With a personality color yellow you have a happy disposition and are cheerful and fun to be with. You are creative, often being the one who comes up with new ideas – an ideas person who needs others to bring the ideas into reality – you tend to have your head in the clouds much of the time. You can be very critical of yourself as well as others – a perfectionist. You analyze everything, all the time, and are methodical in your thinking.

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With a personality color blue as your favorite color you are conservative, reliable and trustworthy – you are quite trusting of others although you are very wary in the beginning until you are sure of the other person. At the same time, you also have a deep need to be trusted. You are not impulsive or spontaneous – you always think before you speak and act and do everything at your own pace in your own time. You take time to process and share your feelings. You are genuine and sincere, and you take your responsibilities seriously. Having a personality color blue means you have a deep need for peace and harmony in your everyday life – you don’t like having your feathers ruffled. You would benefit from daily meditation and quiet time for reflection, introspection and self-discovery.

Source: Personality Color

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Article by LizBeth

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--> Happy Thanksgiving! <--
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Article by LizBeth

~!~ Thanksgiving Recipes ~!~
by Konnan
~!~Very Simple Cranberry Sauce~!~

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This is amazingly simple, 3 ingredients, it thickens by itself!
(Original recipe makes 12 servings)

1 cup white sugar
1 cup orange juice
1 (12 ounce) package fresh cranberries

Add all ingredients to a sauce pan, boil on top of stove, stirring frequently, until desired thickness. Chill and Serve.

~!~Roast Stuffed Turkey~!~

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4 cups dried course bread cubes
one medium onion, chopped
2 Tbsp. Poultry Seasoning
1/2 tsp. Salt
1 egg
1/2 cup water
Mix all ingredients in a large bowl. Add more water if needed to make the stuffing ball up in your hand when squeezed together.

Prepare Turkey:

Remove giblet package from turkey
Wash inside, place on greased roasting pan, breast side up.
Place stuffing mixture in both ends of turkey.
Tuck legs under skin to hold stuffing inside. (you can also stitch or lace with wooden pegs)
Cut off excess neck skin and tuck under turkey.
Place foil around wing ends, and tie wings close to bird with string.
Grease outside of bird with cooking oil and cover with loose foil tent.

A stuffed bird takes longer to roast than one that is unstuffed, so plan to cook it about 25 minutes per pound if under 12 pounds, and 20 minutes per pound if over 12 pound 325 degrees Fahrenheit oven. Remove foil during last 1/2 hour of roasting. Let stand 10 minutes before carving.

This is a basic recipe, you could buy pre-seasoned dressing mixes in a box and use that. You could add apple, cooked meat or other ingredients to your stuffing. Also, I like to boil the giblets in a sauce pan, saving the liquid for making gravy afterwards.
~!~Secret to Making Good Gravy~!~

When your turkey is removed from roasting pan for carving, there will be some 'fat' left in the pan. Drain out all but about 1/2 cup of the fat. Add 1/3 cup of flour directly to the fat, and stir on top of stove until all dry flour is emulsified. (dissolved in the oil). Gradually add the water from your boiled giblets, stirring constantly. Let boil about 1-2 minutes, tasting to be sure there is enough salt & pepper to taste. (You may color with oyster sauce or soy). Then transfer to gravy serving dish. This is much easier than mixing flour with water as a thickener, and you will NOT GET LUMPS!

Now you know 'Grannies simple secrets' for cooking a perfect Turkey Dinner. It has only failed once, the very first time when I asked my Dad how he roasted a turkey...and I said I did not have 'Poultry Seasoning'. He told me to use 'pepper' instead. I used 2 tablespoons of black pepper as a substitute! The stuffing was inedible!!!


Article by MsKonnan

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by Konnan

There are only nine questions. This is a quiz for people who know everything! These are not trick questions. They are straight questions with straight answers.

1. Name the one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends.

2. What famous North American landmark is constantly moving backward?

3. Of all vegetables, only two can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons. All other vegetables must be replanted every year. What are the only two perennial vegetables?

4. What fruit has its seeds on the outside?

5. In many liquor stores, you can buy pear brandy, with a real pear inside the bottle. The pear is whole and ripe, and the bottle is genuine; it hasn't been cut in any way. How did the pear get inside the bottle?

6. Only three words in standard English begin with the letters ' dw' and they are all common words. Name two of them.

7. There are 14 punctuation marks in English grammar. Can you name at least half of them?

8. Name the only vegetable or fruit that is never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form except fresh.

9. Name 6 or more things that you can wear on your feet beginning with the letter 'S.'


Answers to Quiz:

How did you do?

9 correct= Brilliant, 7-8= Pretty darn smart, 5-6= Average, Below 5= How hard did you try? 1-3 = You win the dunce cap!


Article by MsKonnan