TriangleArrow-Left.svgFebruary 2017 Issues of the Questaholic Magazine April 2017TriangleArrow-Right.svg

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by Santa the Bronzed
*podcast voice* And now it’s time for the reader’s questions!
An interview with Col ton


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How long is a normal shower for you? How hot or cold do you prefer the water?
Usually 5-10 minutes. I take a brief ice cold shower in the morning to wake up, then a longer, warmer shower later in the day (usually after lifting).

What is best to be eaten on a baked potato?
Ketchup and cracked black pepper. Maybe bacon. And sour cream.

Which brand of lip moisturizing product do you prefer?
Carmex! Nice and cooling, medicated feel to it
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Sleeping with a fan on, yes or no?
Yes, always

Do you have any childhood nicknames that you want to share?
None that I'm overly proud of

What's your favourite article of clothing to wear?
I love my shirt with Charles Spurgeon's (he was a boss, look him up) face on it. That's all it is, and it's awesome.
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Why have you only posted less than a dozen times on this website in the two years since joining?
I apologize that I'm not very active on forums, I'm just not much of a forum trawler, myself. Plus, I'm constantly busy and rarely even get to turn on my computer nowadays. I'll hope to introduce myself a bit better in these questions!

Where do you in general, (I think you come from Earth, but give us a little hint) - what continent?
I live in West Lafayette, IN in the United States!
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What times do you play? Do you have a real life job and family?
I usually play in the evening if I have time.
I am currently a full-time college student (getting my undergrad so I can go to seminary afterward), a lab assistant at my university's Enology Lab. and a server at a local wine bar. I am 21 and married! My wife and I live in a small house 10-15 minutes outside of campus. She's also a full-time student in addition to being a nanny!

Would you describe yourself as a bosser, skiller, quester? what do you like doing in game the most?
I am through-and-through a quester! I love skilling, but I'd quest constantly if I could! Used to have the MQC, but the Nex AOD has taken that from me for now!

How about posting your Introduction? I couldn't find it. Much has changed since then!


What is your earliest Runescape memory?
Tutorial Island and making my character! Burning shrimp was a rite of passage, man.

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{Editor’s note: ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

You get a ticket to visit Gielinor IRL. Where do you go first?
The Grand Tree in the Tree Gnome Stronghold. I've always loved that place!


If you were to die tomorrow, how would you spend your last day?
I'd spend the day in meditation and prayer alongside my wife and family. Boring, right?

Cutting away from a morbid starter question. Is there something you can remember that made you laugh super hard? Something a friend did, an online video, a TV show skit?
Anything the McElroy brothers do. Look up the podcasts MBMBaM and The Adventure Zone. You will not regret it.

What's your favourite movie?
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When do you find yourself listening to music? Do you have different types of music depending on your activity?
I listen to music in the morning to set my mind right, before work to get in a personable mood, and during my workout to get amped. The one artist I can use to fill all three categories is Wolves at the Gate. But I love everything from rap, to metal, to Celtic, to classical.

Got any siblings?
I have 2 sisters, one older, one younger
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What's your favourite animal?
Favorite animal... that's tough... I think I have to go with the ocelot. Has been my favorite animal for as long as I can remember!

Is there someone (any person at all in the world) that you admire or appreciate the work of? What would you tell them if you were able to have a conversation?
Anyone? John Calvin.
March 2017 009.jpg But you guys likely don't care about that so let's see... Maybe Charlemagne. I was always intrigued by his kingly demeanor and legend
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What kind of sound did you make when you got your dye from the oyster?
Stunned silence, followed 15 seconds later by a girlish squeal. Not ashamed


When did you start playing?
I began playing in June of 2006 at the behest of one of my cousins. He quickly fell away, for he was not one of us, but I have stayed faithful!

What was your very first accomplishment cape?
Does the Legends Cape count? If not, the Defense Skillcape. Impressive
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If I were to visit your country, what do you think I should do first?
Go to a firing range. Guns are great. Then go to a Golden Corral and lose faith in humanity.

What are your favourite cities/locations, both in RS and in real life?
Varrock and Lumbridge in Gielinor; Chicago, IL and my hometown (West Lafayette, IN) have to be it for real life at least right now

Do you have a motto or a favourite phrase? If so, which is it?
"Of two evils, choose neither" - Charles Spurgeon

Do you have a very expensive item (party hat, for instance)? If so, do you remember your reaction when you obtained it?
Got a shadow dye one time, and freaked when it happened. But nope, not at the moment!

Do you play an instrument? Which instrument/s would you like to learn?
I used to play the trumpet and was super good at it... never should have put it down!
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Tell us the story behind your name!
Col ton is my name with a space between it because the name itself was taken. BUT my name was 101duck1 before this one, several years ago. That name was just the creation of the strange mind of an 11 year-old Colton. So yeah.

How many languages do you speak? Which one would you like to learn?
One! I took Spanish classes in high school but forget a ton of it. I'd love to learn Koine Greek and Hebrew.

When did you start cohosting with Shane?
Started guesting on the show probably in 2014 or so, and only did official cohosting beginning last year! If I wasn't so busy, I would be on with him as much as possible!
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On a scale of 1 to Shane, how much do you like talking for the rsbandb?
Shane - 1, I guess?

Best book ever?
The Bible, IMO.
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But for all who don't want to hear that, the whole of the Wheel of Time series.
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*podcast voice* With all this said, see you next month, thank you for sharing your time with us! Thank you for asking, answering and reading, have a great month!

Article by Choto 3000


Sorry if I missed some of you guys! If you can't find yourself on the list, pm me!!

DXP Highscores: The winner is....ROMEO!
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99MagazineDefense.png: Pokes, Choto, Romeo
99MagazineStrength.png: Scy
99MagazineRanged.png: Scy, Moldy, Cireon
99MagazinePrayer.png: Katt
99MagazineMagic.png: Cireon
99MagazineCrafting.png: Xenon, Romeo, Goku, Rob
99MagazineSmithing.png <3: Romeo, Mama, Siropoly
99MagazineFishing.png: Patapolo, Xenon
99MagazineCooking.png: Xenon, Tosols
99MagazineFiremaking.png: Finska, Takis
99MagazineRunecrafting.png: Pokes

99MagazineDungeoneering.png: Cid
99MagazineWoodcutting.png: Goku
99MagazineAgility.png: Goku, Romeo
99MagazineHerblore.png: Katt, Kebab, Firebro, Duke, ARNN
99MagazineFletching.png: Xenon, Iomeces, Goku
99MagazineSlayer.png: Choto, Romeo
99MagazineFarming.png: Cid
99MagazineConstruction.png: Xenon, Mama, Kebab, Duke, Goku
99MagazineHunter.png: Mama, Duke, Cid
99MagazineSummoning.png: Katt, Hemsky, Tora, ARNN, Slayer
99MagazineDivination.png: Mama
99MagazineInvention.png: Romeo, Iskh

120 MagazineDungeoneering.png: Vodka, Kebab
120 MagazineConstruction.png: Vodka, Kebab

MagazineMax.png One of our clannies maxed duing dxp

Magazine15Vet.png One of our clannies got a 15 years veteran cape!

MagazineComp.png One of our clannies comped!

Congratulations all!

Article by Choto 3000

About Brassica Prime.

Written by KatMak of Armadyl

The World Guardian eats a lot of food. The World Guardian feels healthier and more powerful after eating delicious food. "Deliciousness is Power" - Brassica Prime. The World Guardian follows the teachings of Brassica Prime. The World Guardian worships Brassica Prime confirmed.

Tuska was pig. Bacon are made from pigs. Bacon is delicious. Tuska was also very powerful. "Deliciousness is Power" - Brassica Prime. Tuska followed the teachings of Brassica Prime. Tuska worshipped Brassica Prime confirmed.

The Elder Gods eat Anima Mundi. The Elder Gods finds Anima Mundi to be delicious. The Elder Gods are the most powerful beings in the Multiverse. "Deliciousness is Power" - Brassica Prime. The Elder Gods follows the teachings of Brassica Prime. The Elder Gods worship Brassica Prime confirmed.

Jagex made food heal. The healthier someone is, the more power they can have. The food that heals the most is very delicious. "Deliciousness is Power" - Brassica Prime. The Jmods follow the teachings of Brassica Prime confirmed. The Jmods worship Brassica Prime confirmed.

Shrek is love. Shrek is life. Shrek eats food he thinks is delicious. Shrek follows the teachings of Brassica Prime. Shrek worships Brassica Prime confirmed. Love worships Brassica Prime confirmed. Life worships Brassica Prime confirmed. HOWEVER! The food Shrek thinks is delicious isn't actually delicious. It's disgusting. Disgusting is the opposite of delicious. Hatred is the opposite of love. Death is the opposite of life. Shrek is hatred. Shrek is death. Hatred and Death worships Brassica Prime confirmed.

Goku is powerful. Goku also eats lots of food. "Deliciousness is Power" - Brassica Prime. Goku doesn't worship any gods he's fought or trained with. Goku has never fought nor trained with Brassica Prime, and he follows the teachings of Brassica Prime. Goku worships Brassica Prime confirmed.

Brassica Prime is delicious. Therefore everything that is delicious is Brassica Prime. And everything that is Brassica Prime is delicious. Depending on who you ask, everything can be delicious, therefore everything is Brassica Prime.

Llamas walk around eating grass. They also produce spit, which is disgusting and tastes terrible. That is not delicious. And because everything is Brassica Prime, and therefore, must be delicious, Llamas do not exist.

Pandas eat bamboo. They think bamboo is delicious. Pandas are cute. So are the Cute Creatures, which are actually spies. Penguins are also spies. Therefore Pandas are spies.

Bronze is nooby equipment. Noobs usually eat cabbages. Brassica Prime has declared that cabbages are delicious, and therefore, powerful things. Since Noobs in Bronze eat cabbages, they must be the most powerful people around. Bronze is the best gear confirmed.

Everything that exists is delicious, for everything that exists is Brassica Prime. Since the food Shrek thinks is delicious is actually disgusting, delicious things are both delicious and disgusting at the same time. Because delicious things are also disgusting, and only delicious things exist, Brassica Prime is everything that exist, and everything that doesn't exist. Therefore, Brassica Prime, is a Llama.

Since Brassica Prime is everything that exists, and everything that doesn't exist, everything is everything else. Therefore, people are cannonballs.

Take it to W66 Fally.

Article by KatMak

Tyco's Questing Crossword
PM all 11 words in the crossword below to Tyco elf
to enter the raffle with the following prices:

1st price: 22- star3.png A picture project, dedicated to you and you only! 22- star3.png
2nd price: 20 million gp!
3rd price: 10 million gp!

Please note that participants who has already had a personal picture project cannot win the first price. Those who enter will be drawn before the release of next issue of questaholic and published, along with the answers to this crossword.

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1. VIP NPC in Clan Quest.
2. Sound of an iconic beast of burden.
3. Adventurous with a bone crossbow.
4. This guy sure loves his sand.
5. Short people living with nature.

6. The dragon of Clan Quest.
7. The adventurer who mastered the art of fire!
8. Lead designer of Jagex.
9. Fremennik way of storing beer.
10. Loved minigame by cats, now removed.
11. The master of shadows.

EDIT: The 1st place winner will now have the choice between the 20M gp or the picture project. If gp is chosen, then the 2nd place will have the choice between 10M gp or the picture project. If gp is taken, 3rd place will receive the picture project. This after feedback about participants considering the 1st price being of less value than the 2nd or 3rd prices.

Article by Tyco elf

Bulletin - March 2017

February was an exciting month. While everybody was busy profiting from the double xp weekend as much as possible, Jagex was jamming away at some exciting projects. A surprising large number of these projects will be right up our clan's alley, because there are some cool quests in the pipeline. We also got an exciting new Penguin quest this month.

Enough RuneScape excitement this month, but what happened in Clan Quest?

Recruitment changes
Last month, Draz kicked off a proposed change to the recruitment thread. As mentioned in my vision for 2017, we want to make Clan Quest a place where everybody can feel welcome. This means including those that no longer play Runescape, or have maybe never played it at all. We want to make it possible for members to register for our clan without having to go through the Runescape forums. This means allowing them to register using the offsite. If you have any thoughts on this, or want to read more, check out this thread.

Making a change like this is a big step, and we will not do it overnight. You as a clan seem to be happy with this idea, which means we can move forward on this. We will have to revisit many things that make Clan Quest the clan you are used to, and have to make sure we don't change that. We will be redefining what it means to be a Clan Quest member, and make sure that nobody has to feel like a second class citizen. During the process, we will be keeping in touch with all of you, and make sure everybody is happy with where we are going. Keep an eye on this spot for further information.

Last month I promised you all a survey. Due to personal circumstances, I did not have as much time to spend on Clan Quest as I had hoped for. The time I did have I had to redirect into other efforts. This means that the survey will probably be held at another point in time in the near feature.

PSA: scammers
Just this week we had another case of somebody impersonating a clan member and asking for money. They often use a name very similar to a clan member's name and contact you through private chat. Please be careful if you are contacted by such a member, and report any suspicious behaviour to a councillor so that we can make our members aware of it. We try to ban these people from the clan chat as soon as we are aware of it.

New offsite
It has been a while since we last heard about the new offsite, so I felt I had to mention it. We haven't had as much time as we wanted to work on the offsite, but rest assured that we are still doing our best to get it to you as soon as possible. We want to make sure we have a good migration strategy so that we can transfer all your data to the new offsite. All in all, it is coming along really nicely, and you may be able to get your hands on it sooner than you think!

Article by Cireon

Clan Quest Members Update
New Members of Clan Quest
The last month has seen five new members join the clan! Please give them a warm welcome and make them feel at home! The new members of the clan are
  • Alqam!
  • chris 10617!
  • Tycoelf, Tyco Elf's noob!
  • R0nue!
  • account4rent!

The Recruitment Razzers, the chief body responsible for reaching out to possible new members, and they're always looking for a hand. You can always contact Irene Angel/Jjasm if you're interested!

Welcome to the Offsite
The offsite is a pivotal part of our clan structure, and the more people that use it the better! This last month we welcomed three new members to the offsite:

Hope you all enjoy what we have to offer, and what more we'll have to offer very soon!

Clan Quest Promotions
Because our ranking system is primarily based on quest points, a promotion is a symbol of your progress as an adventurer! Here are all of the members who have been promoted in the last month:
  • Gladion: Sergeant -> Captain, congratulations on your Quest Cape!
  • KatMak: Recruit -> Lieutenant, congratulations on your promotion to full member!
  • Soul Scythe: Recruit -> Sergeant, congratulations on your promotion to full member!
  • Supertje32: Sergeant -> Admin
  • Tycoelf the elven noob: Corporal -> Organizer
  • PrimalPeace: Recruit -> Corporal, congratulations on your promotion to full member!

Congratulations, everyone! You can find more information on our ranks on our official recruitment thread.

Article by Sirapyro

RSMV Review

Ahh.. good old ChaosJess. This time it's Angel With a Shotgun by The Cab. Extremely nice storyline where the three sides of tetsu, seasinger and deathlotus warriors fought over generations for the betterment of their future. The one thing I admire about her is that her editing is minimalist but still goosebump inducing, if there's such a phrase. Not much needs to be said, I've watched it myself over 30 times. It is my favourite RSMV made in the whole of 2016. This might just be her swan song.. I hope not. I have a multi editor project part waiting for her to upload.. looking forward to the whole thing.

Article by SantaEnds