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A group of Questers gathered to honor the great cabbage with their Quest Cape emotes!

The Church of Brassica Prime is a parody group created by Rerecros in honor of Clan Quests absolute love of cabbage. As the official religion of the cabbage God Brassica Prime, the Church of Brassica Prime has had widespread success amongst the Questing Clan of RuneScape's hungry members. The Church has two major goals, listed upon its founding: To spread the glory of Cabbage, and to make fun of other RuneScape religions. While it never took off as an independant RuneScape Clan, as originally intended, the ingame chat "Primeschurch" served as its church.

The Ten Commandments

  1. I am thy Cabbage, thou shalt have no other vegetable before me.
  2. Thou shalt not make for yourself a false Cabbage.
  3. Thou shalt not take the name Cabbage in vain.
  4. Keep Holy the Cabbage day.
  5. Honor thy Brassica and Olaracca.
  6. Thou shalt not eat another Cabbage.
  7. Thou shalt not do the nasty with a Cabbage . . . that's just wrong.
  8. Thou shalt not take another's Cabbage.
  9. Thou shalt not mislead a Cabbage.
  10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's patch.

Church's Ranks

  1. Pope: There will be only one. This position lasts 'til resignation. He is the unanimous head of the Church, and is responsible for direct communication with Brassica Prime, and the administration and oversight of the Church as a whole.
  2. Arch Cardinal: There will not be more than one per thirty other members of the Church, however, there will always be at least two. They are responsible for administration of all things Church related, and are the "keepers of the patch."
  3. Cardinal: There shall not exist more than one for every fiften members of the Church, however no less than five may exist at any given time. They are responsible for maintaining an atmosphere that encourages worship at all times. They are the lowest rank that may accept donations. They are responsible for making possible the Church sponsored events.
  4. Arch Bishop: There shall not exist more than one for every five members of the Church, there is no minimum number of Arch Bishops.
  5. Bishop: A rank achioeved through normal means of promotion, it has no minimum or maximum limitations.
  6. Priest: The bulk of the Church. All members who have been fully accepted, and have not achieved a higher rank.
  7. Believers: A person who is not "of the cloth" but whom the Church has deemed a devout believer. For a believer to gain the rank of Priest, and full acceptance into the church of Brassica Prime, they must gather and donate 5,000 cabbages to the Church of Brassica Prime.
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Donations

The Church of Brassica Prime only accepted donations in the form of Cabbages. Donations were often the only route to promotion within the Church, with varying "tiers" of donations leading to different positions in the Church. Donating 5,000 Cabbages to the Church would result in a promotion from being a "Believer" to a "Preist". In order to be promoted to a "Bishop" from a "Priest", one must have donated another 25,000 Cabbages. Donating an additonal 50,000 Cabbages would grant one the rank of Arch Bishop. A maximum of 80,000 Cabbages, therefore, must have been donated in order to achieve all "buyable" ranks.

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Market Manipulation

While not considered to be an official act of the Church, there were many instances of sudden, dramatic changes in the market prime of Cabbage on the RuneScape 3 Grand Exchange, as seen to the right. It is known that the market manipulators were followers of Brassica Prime and members of the Questing Clan of RuneScape, but it remains hotly debated whether or not they were acting on behalf of the Church. Known market manipulators include but are not limited to:
Ytse - Arguably the most famous of the manipulators, as his purchasing continued well after the activity of the Church. Noted as having purchased, and in known possession of over 1 million cabbages
Stargate - Having purchased and in known possession of over 25 million cabbages
Rerecros - Having purchased and in known possession of over 3 million cabbages
Draziw - Having purchased and in known possession of over 10 million cabbages

Due to the Church's leadership disbanding and the formal organization of the Church shutting down, they have been unavailable to give any kind of comment.

Trivia

  • The Church of Brassica Prime was an actual attempt at a RuneScape Clan, but was largely abandoned when "Multi-clanning", the act of being a member of multiple different RuneScape Clans at once, was abandoned with the 2011 Clan overhaul.
  • The Church of Brassica Prime was fopunded on August 11th, 2010, and is one of the earliest documented instances of Clan Quest's love for Cabbage.
  • Clan Quest's love for(worship of) Cabbage is one of the longest running inside jokes of Clan Quest's history.